Overcoming survival instinct seems impossible

[yukiovos]

I need a way to overcome it once and for all, to make my brain want to ctb with me, and not act against me.
I already failed once with partial hanging after my brain woke me up and made me stand to allow oxygen to enter it.

Im sick of this, sick of the human biology that is designed to make me stay alive for as long as possible

 

[LifeIsASadist]

If you could get xanax that might help