I am/was an awful person. I became my abusive mother. I was terrible. I mean awful. I had a suicide attempt in November and I honestly don't know why anyone picked THAT day to care. I really don't. For two years I begged for help. I wasn't strong enough to get it on my own. For two years no one listened. Only to find out my husband had been skimming money for that time to divorce me. I went to residential treatment for 45 days and learned so much about myself. Then I went to the step down for another 45 days. I came back hoping for a different relationship with everyone.
Six months before my suicide attempt my husband informed all of my friends and family that he was divorcing me. Six months. Not one person told me. When I called my sister crying she didn't put up her fists and defend me like I expected, she said "Well, you haven't been happy for a long time". That is when it clicked that everyone knew. It suddenly became crystal clear. I was and am alone.
I came back hopeful that I could rebuild my individual relationships with them. I quickly found out that they were all talking behind my back. But they all denied it. Today, my husband/ex-husband confirmed they were all talking. I was asked to identify one person that I could count on, and I identified my sister. I called her and asked if she could forgo a relationship in order to be my support person. She agreed. Unfortunately, this wasn't to last for very long. It was within just a couple weeks that I found out my children, sister and parents were all talking to see what I told them.
I signed a divorce agreement and found out today that he hid money that wasn't disclosed on the financial report. He lied about his retirement. And now, the house is being sold, which I will get half of, plus a small additional amount. I settled for $500/mo rather than $2000/mo. I got screwed.
I was supposed to have custody revisited with successful completion of my treatment programs. He won't do it. So, I filed in court for my son. Now the fight is on. I can only see my son maybe once a month when I can find a supervisor. And, he is moving 90 minutes away. He said he was staying in our town.
I have been ready to ctb since November, but I did what I was told and it wasn't enough.
Next week our house is supposed to close. I have two options, refuse to sign the paperwork and face litigation OR file an emergency order to keep the money in escrow while we subpoena his records. Either way, this divorce has sucked all the money out of me. I don't have it to give up.
Six months before my suicide attempt my husband informed all of my friends and family that he was divorcing me. Six months. Not one person told me. When I called my sister crying she didn't put up her fists and defend me like I expected, she said "Well, you haven't been happy for a long time". That is when it clicked that everyone knew. It suddenly became crystal clear. I was and am alone.
I came back hopeful that I could rebuild my individual relationships with them. I quickly found out that they were all talking behind my back. But they all denied it. Today, my husband/ex-husband confirmed they were all talking. I was asked to identify one person that I could count on, and I identified my sister. I called her and asked if she could forgo a relationship in order to be my support person. She agreed. Unfortunately, this wasn't to last for very long. It was within just a couple weeks that I found out my children, sister and parents were all talking to see what I told them.
I signed a divorce agreement and found out today that he hid money that wasn't disclosed on the financial report. He lied about his retirement. And now, the house is being sold, which I will get half of, plus a small additional amount. I settled for $500/mo rather than $2000/mo. I got screwed.
I was supposed to have custody revisited with successful completion of my treatment programs. He won't do it. So, I filed in court for my son. Now the fight is on. I can only see my son maybe once a month when I can find a supervisor. And, he is moving 90 minutes away. He said he was staying in our town.
I have been ready to ctb since November, but I did what I was told and it wasn't enough.
Next week our house is supposed to close. I have two options, refuse to sign the paperwork and face litigation OR file an emergency order to keep the money in escrow while we subpoena his records. Either way, this divorce has sucked all the money out of me. I don't have it to give up.
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