my attempt is planned for one week from today. there is one singular circumstance that would make me change my mind, but it will never happen, so it's just a matter of waiting through another 7 days.
i'm glad i haven't acted out of impulse in the meantime. there have been plenty of opportunities that came up by surprise, such as my roommates being gone for an extended amount of time, but i restrained myself and i think i will have the best chance of success with my plan.
i would praise myself for acting so "normal" so that people don't catch on, but i have been pretty transparent about my feelings with some of the people i'm close with. i'm not sure if they just don't take me seriously because of my long history of mental health struggles. maybe they just think it's dark humor. perhaps they just don't care. either way, suspicion hasn't been raised to a point where my attempt is in jeopardy.
i guess i'll just do my best to enjoy the last remaining time i have in this body.
i'm glad i haven't acted out of impulse in the meantime. there have been plenty of opportunities that came up by surprise, such as my roommates being gone for an extended amount of time, but i restrained myself and i think i will have the best chance of success with my plan.
i would praise myself for acting so "normal" so that people don't catch on, but i have been pretty transparent about my feelings with some of the people i'm close with. i'm not sure if they just don't take me seriously because of my long history of mental health struggles. maybe they just think it's dark humor. perhaps they just don't care. either way, suspicion hasn't been raised to a point where my attempt is in jeopardy.
i guess i'll just do my best to enjoy the last remaining time i have in this body.
