My life has been a nightmare that has only gotten worse over the years, starting with coming out of my Psycho mother's womb as a vunerable child. I had medical problems, and undiagnosed issues like severe social anxiety panic disorder, high functioning autism, brain fog, etc. I don't have the power to handle or succeed with the normal systems of life (a job, college, etc). Nobody wants to deal with me, especially at this point, I'm 42, no one cares to really help me. I've exhausted all options, there is nothing left but 1, and it looks discouraging. Even trying to at least leave my life story behind is too triggering for me. My mother destroyed my life, others abused me, and now the world treats me like trash, even doctors. It's hard to accept that my life never mattered, there was never a GOD, and all the hell I went thru was for nothing, and I should have just CTBed when I was 10 years old when I realized my mother was an evil person that was targeting me. I will have to end up jumping from somewhere as a last desperate attempt at eternal peace. It's only a matter of time... If not, this year then probably next year. Tik Tok goes the clock, counting down to my suicide. If only I was never born, especially with the worst luck ever.
FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 38,878
That sounds really horrible what you went through, this world certainly is hell to me because of all the endless amounts of torture that unfortunately exists here. Of course it disgusts me how people force life into this world just to treat them so badly, and it's beyond awful how humans create so much harm. There certainly does seem to be no peace from suffering in this world, but anyway I wish you the best.
SilentSadness
The rain pours eternally.
- Feb 28, 2023
- 1,125
I agree that what you've described is unacceptable. Life is such constant torment and people can be so mean, even to their own family who they dragged here without consent. You definitely don't deserve to be abused in this cruel and unfair world so I hope things improve for you. I so wish I was able to ctb and be rid of this mess, unfortunately the people who abuse others are the same people who restrict access to ctb methods. I really hate the way this world is.
