Resource On the book “The Forever Decision”

[starsofevernight]

https://qprinstitute.com/pdfs/Forever_Decision.pdf

I like it. My friend and I, both suicidal, liked the agency it gives you. How it doesn't say you have to be mentally ill or insane to want to die.

Instead of a book saying to call a hotline or push through or whatever, it simply asks you to stop, and think things through. Explains how sometimes the benefit you think dying would bring won't actually happen in some cases. The risks of failing. The consequences on the ones that love you. And it doesn't guilt trip you into living, it simply states the axioms and provokes you to think about it for yourself.

Yes, it's a book trying to logic you out of dying, but it is actually…logical, if you know what I mean. It's not just platitudes—"it gets better" or "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem"—it actually explains with decent reasoning. And at the end of the day it is still your choice.

You don't have to read it and have your mind changed. But I think it does help, at least me, to think about it with a more clear head. I recommend going in with an open mind if you can.
Funnily enough, I found the book from someone linking to it here, on SS. I'm thankful to that person.

 

[EmptyBottle]

https://qprinstitute.com/pdfs/Forever_Decision.pdf

I like it. My friend and I, both suicidal, liked the agency it gives you. How it doesn't say you have to be mentally ill or insane to want to die.

Instead of a book saying to call a hotline or push through or whatever, it simply asks you to stop, and think things through. Explains how sometimes the benefit you think dying would bring won't actually happen in some cases. The risks of failing. The consequences on the ones that love you. And it doesn't guilt trip you into living, it simply states the axioms and provokes you to think about it for yourself.

Yes, it's a book trying to logic you out of dying, but it is actually…logical, if you know what I mean. It's not just platitudes—"it gets better" or "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem"—it actually explains with decent reasoning. And at the end of the day it is still your choice.

You don't have to read it and have your mind changed. But I think it does help, at least me, to think about it with a more clear head. I recommend going in with an open mind if you can.
Funnily enough, I found the book from someone linking to it here, on SS. I'm thankful to that person.

wow, me too, it sits in an encrypted downloads folder.

I really like the non-pushy aspect of the book, and it explains why ppl consider CTB... as a shortcut "solution" to issues that may have simpler and less drastic solutions.... and explains the various options available.

 

[starsofevernight]

wow, me too, it sits in an encrypted downloads folder.

I really like the non-pushy aspect of the book, and it explains why ppl consider CTB... as a shortcut "solution" to issues that may have simpler and less drastic solutions.... and explains the various options available.

definitely, it's probably one of my favourite anti-suicide resources, because it frames CTB as your choice, and doesn't just tell you to survive by distracting yourself.

I like how the book basically goes "it's your choice at the end of the day, but here's the actual ramifications of that choice, and rebuttals for some reasonings as to why one might make it. CTB might not accomplish what you think it does or want it to, so please think it over to see if it's actually right for you."

the thing is, not every single person who ever wants to kill themself is better off dead—there's so many who just feel like suicide is the best option regarding say, being a virgin or short-term stress or a bad breakup. and feeling suicidal over that is valid, it's just not rationally the optimal choice
for some people, CTB is just better than their life. I'd say short term, treatable mental illnesses it's better to push through (I had schizophreniform disorder, basically short term schizophrenia uh search it up, and although it was life ruining at the time I was effectively treated with medication. if I killed myself over it, it wouldn't have been worth it) but long term depression or cptsd or bpd…man

I'm not the greatest fan of the getting help section, but that's not the books fault (the book explains the mental health system and crisis lines pretty well), that's society's fault for the fact that mental health help is so shitty / expensive / inaccessible etc

 

[Grimlock]

Yes, it's a book trying to logic you out of dying, but it is actually…logical, if you know what I mean. It's not just platitudes—"it gets better" or "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem"—it actually explains with decent reasoning. And at the end of the day it is still your choice.

You have convinced me to give it a read, now I have something to look forward to this weekend. Even if this book does not manage to change my mind I think I will enjoy the thought process, honest and logical, without condemning or condoning. Thank you for recommending this, I am glad to have come across your post.

 

[einsam]

Explains how sometimes the benefit you think dying would bring won't actually happen in some cases.

Could you expand on this point? I've never thought of suicide in terms of benefits or pros and cons so I'm not sure what this means.

 

[EmptyBottle]

Could you expand on this point? I've never thought of suicide in terms of benefits or pros and cons so I'm not sure what this means.

Here's my pros and cons (idk what the other person would have wrote tho).

Pros:
> Cost of living = $0 when dead
> Unable to experience unwanted stuff

Cons:
> Unable to experience interesting stuff
> Pets, online friends, family and more will miss me

Update: silly me, it was about the book... the book mentioned pain being gone as a pro... and loss of future good as a con.

 

[MapleS]

good book, I wanted to bump it

 

[nyotei_]

sounds like it may be meant for someone like me, I will definitely give this a read. thank you.

 

[Warlord's Pulse]

I feel the need to say, despite being against the majority, that I didn't like the book at all
It feels like a book for "neurotypical suicidals" if I can say so, it assumes a lot of things that may be right for neurotypicals, but then it has a very clear selection bias
Some of the advice are so reddit-y, "bro, you need to like yourself bro, everyone is a bit lonely bro"

Edit: oh, and a very important thing to notice: the book was originally published in late 80s, and mostly refers to his clinical experience that took place in USA, so it's clearly not intended for modern or subdeveloped circunstances