Story on my own terms

[propofol]

hello guys and gals. i was planning to ctb for a long period of time. in something like 24 hours i would be dead (hopefully). i'm an alcoholic and a gambler. 10 years ago i was diagnosed with severe and drug resistant depression. morever, few days ago i dropped from an uni and my girlfriend left me. i had a previous attempt but i was so drunk that i miscalculated some things. here's the plan:

7:00 wake up call
7:30 shaving, brushing teeth, just regular shit
8:00-10:00 workout (i used to love that shit)
11:00 buying some vodka, marlboro reds and pizza
12:00-12:30 by this time i should be at the spot
13:00 starting to drink and preparing stuff. taking some benzos if necessary (i was on last year of pharmacy school so i know my shit)
15:00 hanging myself (full suspension)

and that's it. i guess there are no grounbreaking things. another drunkard with debts commited suicide. i'm not going to leave any letter and i'm leaving my phone at home. sorry for my bad english.

 

[ocd is bad]

Sorry you had such a rough time man. I hope you find peace.

 

[aukguy]

A fellow gambler here - not placed a bet for around 10 months, but the damage was already done and the debts amassed and life ruined. It truly is a horrible addiction and my heart goes out to yours. Wish you peace.

 

[propofol]

gambling is really shitty. countless of 'i did not bet in a week, this time i'll make a spectacular comeback'.

but today is a special day. i'm going to waste some money on roulette.

 

[ocd is bad]

I gotta ask man, why the 2 hour workout? Do you enjoy lifting that much?

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

Yeah, the 2-hour workout would do me in!

It sounds like you have this all planned out. I wish you peace throughout the day and always.

 

[propofol]

well, the time has come. i have literally no idea what to write. thanks for the support anf fuck the world.

 

[aukguy]

hope you get to read this, have a good journey

 

[TAW122]

I'm sorry that life has beat you down and that you have been suffering for a long time. I hope you are able to find peace with whatever choice you make.

 

[ThreeWords]

Thinking about you and hope you get to read this. I hope you can find peace.

 

[I screwed up]

r u with us OP ? you are a brave person , hope u find the peace u looking for ...