Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Sometimes I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,825
antipsychotics - severe side effects
mood stabilizers - too sum it up too dangerous
back to searching for antidepressants i guess. i had already searched through them but since have lost trust in the site i was using so i have to start over.

this is getting really hopeless......

(typically id say i feel this belongs here and if someone doesnt thats not my problem because its not my fault they dont understand how i feel. however this one ill explain because i can see why one would think that it belongs in recovery however that last line is what made me decide to put it here. i still dont feel like im going to find anything to help)
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
It seems we're running out of options little by little!
In my case, mood stabilizers and sleeping pills are kinda helping but yesterday, damn! I thought I would ctb impulsively!

Hope we can get out from this depression hole somehow.
 
Last edited:
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Sometimes I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,825
It seems we're running out of options little by little!
In my case, mood stabilizers and sleeping pills are kinda helping but yesterday, damn! I thought I would ctb impulsively!

Hope we can't get out from this depression hole somehow.
its one of those 'the grass is greener on the other side until you get there" situations but in my case i know my situation. i wish i was "completely" suicidal. its difficult to explain, one would just have to know. at least if i was completely suicidal this would be easier.
 
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Symbiote

Global Mod
Oct 12, 2020
3,101
It's the reason why I stopped taking all medications. Side effects and the gauntlet of trial and error to get a desired outcome only for my body to build resistance over time. Can't live life with them, can't live without, but at least without medication I have some semblance of control. Medicines to me are only a band-aid over a festering wound.
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Sometimes I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,825
It's the reason why I stopped taking all medications. Side effects and the gauntlet of trial and error to get a desired outcome only for my body to build resistance over time. Can't live life with them, can't live without, but at least without medication I have some semblance of control. Medicines to me are only a band-aid over a festering wound.
well im currently on busprione and it is helping. but im still suicidal. all it did was quiet the voices in my head. they still talk theyre just in a different room. which alone has helped a lot however i still need a mood stabilizer because of my bpd and whatnot. im currently drinking shroom coffee which again makes the days more livable however im out until that shows up. and it still doesnt help with the personality problem or anything.

i just feel so close ya know?
 
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Symbiote

Global Mod
Oct 12, 2020
3,101
Yeah, I feel ya on being on the edge. All it takes for me is some life event, even a minor one, that may send me over.
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Sometimes I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,825
Yeah, I feel ya on being on the edge. All it takes for me is some life event, even a minor one, that may send me over.
its like trying to pull yourself out of a well but the rope youre using is covered in grease.
 
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SHThrowAway213

SHThrowAway213

That's the hell I live with
Apr 19, 2018
658
Only one antipsychotic works for me, and I had to take another pill because of the side effects, and even then that only helps with my hallucinations.
Everyone always says It will get better! Or it is only temporary, when it is not.
There is no hope.
I wish I was successful.
 
saltshaker

saltshaker

salt shaker, rule breaker
Jan 29, 2021
402
It's the reason why I stopped taking all medications. Side effects and the gauntlet of trial and error to get a desired outcome only for my body to build resistance over time. Can't live life with them, can't live without, but at least without medication I have some semblance of control. Medicines to me are only a band-aid over a festering wound.
I'm in the same boat, i haven't been on medication in a couple of years. I think for a lot of people miserable is just your default state, and there's not much use fighting it.

Trying to stay busy/distracted helps a lot. Enjoy those brief moments of fleeting joy if you're lucky enough to experience them. This is as good as it gets.
 

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