B
beyondgone
Member
- Mar 3, 2023
- 82
If we're lucky we spend 1/3 of our lives sleeping, how many times have you slept and not dreamt? You don't know you're asleep it's just nothingness until you wake up and instantly you're bundled by all the pressures of life, I'm not depressed I'm not crazy or lazy just nothing interests me, i remember in primary school I said il be dead by 30 and I didn't even know what it really meant, I must have been year 2 (I'm from the uk) I don't even know where the comment came from but it has stuck with me this whole time, I'm now 26 I've attempted to ctb on countless occasions and never got it right, on paper I have everything going, financially stable, supportive girlfriend and family, 3 children and yet I feel empty, I know I'm supposed to love them and I do but it's just not enough, I feel like I'm living to just not disappoint them which is inevitable anyway, we all die we all hurt eachother eventually and I just feel like I don't belong here, no purpose, no goals or ambitions I simply want to sleep forever, I know I'm a piece of shit for willingly abandoning my family but it's selfish of me to stay just to disappoint them anyway, life is meaningless I'm so ungrateful and I can't change I'm just not meant to be here