Help no supplies & no way to buy anything to ctb

[meowalyst]

i don't have the money to buy SN, although i did spend time looking at mic and checking it out. i can't buy a 12 mm or 10 mm rope, i only own a super tiny one. it'll hold me, but it's so so so small and painful around the neck. hanging is something that i keep pussying out of aswell. i would do it if i had a 12mm

i need to find a way to ctb without spending money if that's possible. i tried shallow water blackout 3 times and was not successful, ill keep trying overtime while i get advice.

i have a train by me and thats the only option i can think of, but the idea of somebody scraping me off the tracks is disturbing and i dislike that. is there ANY natural ways to go through with this or do it at home?

 

[hdead]

You'll need some kind of resource to do it reliably.. Sorry to say. A couple of bucks to buy a rope, or a ligature, would be the absolute minimum. Otherwise the only thing I can think of is jumping. :/

 

[meowalyst]

You'll need some kind of resource to do it reliably.. Sorry to say. A couple of bucks to buy a rope, or a ligature, would be the absolute minimum. Otherwise the only thing I can think of is jumping. :/

no worries. i still live with my uncle and aunt since i graduated, which was only a few months ago. it's very difficult to slip past them especially when we share locations

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

Can't pay with credit? It's not like you'll ever have to pay the bill.

 

[meowalyst]

Can't pay with credit? It's not like you'll ever have to pay the bill.

i have cash and card, i could buy it but the chances my family will recieve the package, be snoopy and still open it even with my name on it is more than likely. im very paranoid about that

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

i have cash and card, i could buy it but the chances my family will recieve the package, be snoopy and still open it even with my name on it is more than likely. im very paranoid about that

Idk, I'd try to say it's for something else if possible, like a special kind of relaxing epsom salt to soak in or an exfoliating salt.

 

[meowalyst]

Idk, I'd try to say it's for something else if possible, like a special kind of relaxing epsom salt to soak in or an exfoliating salt.

that's very smart, thank you<3. is SN your method aswell? i think i've seen you around those type of threads

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

that's very smart, thank you<3. is SN your method aswell? i think i've seen you around those type of threads

Well, I'd much rather you find another way forward as things may change a lot for the better in the years to come… but I definitely don't want you to throw yourself in front of a train .

Nitrogen is my plan A, but I wouldn't feel comfortable without a backup, so SN is my plan B.

 

[coralreefer]

Is jumping also something you have an aversion to? Idk what else to recommend if not that