No friends, nothing left

[sad_gurl_thoughts]

I have no friends after two breakups. Both exes have way more social clout, so now it feels like the entire community I was a part of now hates me. I don't get included in events often, and the few I'm invited to are painfully uncomfortable bc I feel so unwelcome.

Why would I not kill myself? I have nothing left.

 

[FuneralCry]

Some people really are so cruel and in general, I think that people can be very disappointing. I'm sorry that you are in this situation. This life really is so depressing. I hope you find relief from your suffering.

 

[Huntfish34]

I think you Might have more left than you think . But have had those thoughts a lot myself and can understand,. Thoughts and prayers to you -

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I can relate with where you are. I have no friends. And no relatives left really. No close ones anyway. Just me. Sometimes, I may get a call, other than a robocall, every eight weeks or so. It is what it is.

 

[DPJ187]

I wish you peace. You are part of this community, i want you to remember that.

 

[sad_gurl_thoughts]

Thank you all.

Forgot to mention the still overwhelming heartbreak that makes every day excruciating. Combined with the isolation my life feels like a never-ending hell.

 

[Flying Away]

Thank you all.

Forgot to mention the still overwhelming heartbreak that makes every day excruciating. Combined with the isolation my life feels like a never-ending hell.

I know the feeling. Good luck to you. Im less than 24 hours away from ending my pain. Whatever you decide peace be the journey

 

[Why Me?]

I have no friends after two breakups. Both exes have way more social clout, so now it feels like the entire community I was a part of now hates me. I don't get included in events often, and the few I'm invited to are painfully uncomfortable bc I feel so unwelcome.

Why would I not kill myself? I have nothing left.

Seems like you can easily get over this and still find happiness. Forget that community. Figure out how to join a new community or start your own. Maybe you need to make a lifestyle change, and meet new people. There is a whole world full of billions of people. I wish were problems were as light as yours. I can't even make friends if I wanted to. You just need to get new friends, and master enjoying being alone in the meantime. This is a petty reason to kill yourself, that's what I think. It takes time to get over a break up, and to master being alone, but you can be stronger and wiser in the end.

 

[sad_gurl_thoughts]

This is a petty reason to kill yourself

This comment really rubs me wrong. I'm not here to judge anyone's reasons for being depressed or wanting to kill themselves.

You're also implying it's easy to make new friends, particularly as an adult that's not the case. Books, articles, etc have been written about how much harder it is to connect socially as an adult.

I'm sorry you're also in some kind of pain, but don't come to people's posts to judge them or to suggest you have it so much worse. This is a safe space.

If my heartbreak makes me want to kill myself then that is my experience.

 

[Why Me?]

This comment really rubs me wrong. I'm not here to judge anyone's reasons for being depressed or wanting to kill themselves.

You're also implying it's easy to make new friends, particularly as an adult that's not the case. Books, articles, etc have been written about how much harder it is to connect socially as an adult.

I'm sorry you're also in some kind of pain, but don't come to people's posts to judge them or to suggest you have it so much worse. This is a safe space.

If my heartbreak makes me want to kill myself then that is my experience.

I understand your response. I'm not surprised it rubbed you the wrong way, however should I not give my opinion, because I think someone won't like it? Is that how we should define a "safe space?" Suicide is an extremely serious matter, there's no coming back from it, therefore if I feel like a person is making that choice based on something that I think they can probably change, why not see if they will change their mind. Not being able to make friends, can be very difficult, but based on what you shared it just seemed like you have not tried to allow life to provide you with more opportunities. Regardless of my opinion, I'm sorry I made you feel this way, it's just hard knowing that my situation is so extremely complicated and terrible at 41, like no chance to enjoy life which makes me want to CBT, but I rather be able to enjoy life & live long. I just wanted my opinion to make you have some hope, so you wouldn't let those people get the best of you, and in a few years have a life that you think is worth living as a stronger person, even without a big social network. I'm sorry I offended you. I just don't want you to CBT so easily over some people that used to like you. I'm very sorry. I hope you understand. Also, I believe I'm on the spectrum of autism, my social skills have been horrible, so please consider that. I'm now realizing I should have added more compassion & understanding to my comment, sorry.

 

[DPJ187]

Heartbreak itself has actually caused death on a few occasions. It's the absolute worst thing and unfortunately the purer the love the harder it is. We do not minimise your pain or your suffering. I relate to exactly what you are saying. My heart hurts, everyday, incredible pain, ,like going through a bereavement but without the closure. Please just take it easy on yourself, your partner will also,be feeling heartache and if they are not then they were not the one for you. Love yourself and be true. Fill your heart with yourself, then you will be truly happy

 

[sad_gurl_thoughts]

I'm sorry I offended you. I just don't want you to CBT so easily over some people that used to like you. I'm very sorry. I hope you understand.

Appreciate you circling back to respond and clarify your initial comment. I hope you find the peace you seek.

My broader take-away is that the people in this community are generally in a lot of pain and most of us feel we're at the end of our rope. Our ropes may look different, different lengths, different fibers, but it's not on any one of us to judge how or why someone ended up clinging to the final threads of theirs, wishing to let go. There is too much nuance in our lives to feel that someone else's reason for CTB isn't as good as ours. We only know as much about someone's pain as they choose to share with us.

Heartbreak and social isolation may not be good reasons for you to CTB, but after living alone in a one-room apartment for 2yrs of a pandemic, those reasons are certainly enough to push me past my breaking point. Also agreed with the above comment: plenty of people have killed themselves over heartbreak alone, so that reason must be valid enough. There are many poems, songs, stories on the topic, so it's a common human response to react to heartbreak with thoughts of CTB…whether you execute on those ideations or not.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

It sucks that this happened to you, and I am sorry about your break ups. If you do decide to stick around, I hope you find someone that cherishes you.

Regardless, I hope you find peace in whichever path you choose to embark on.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I'm not surprised it rubbed you the wrong way, however should I not give my opinion, because I think someone won't like it?

Maybe give it in a less "attacking" kind of way. Using words like "For me, I don't feel this is a very good reason". Something like that.

 

[Why Me?]

Maybe give it in a less "attacking" kind of way. Using words like "For me, I don't feel this is a very good reason". Something like that.

Yeah, I definitely could have explained myself better. It's a shame that my bad social skills have even followed me to a suicide forum. I'm goin to try to push forward, and not be negative about it, but if I think I'm better off not talking on this forum, I will. Thanks for your advice.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Sometimes when people have the set of circumstances we wish we had, but still are wanting to CTB (youth, beauty, money, etc), it is hard for us to understand, much less accept that they would still rather have CTB.

However, her struggles are probably magnified to her (or minimized to you) for various reasons. All reasons are valid and it is okay to not understand one's reasons. We are all human after all.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Yeah, I definitely could have explained myself better. It's a shame that my bad social skills have even followed me to a suicide forum. I'm goin to try to push forward, and not be negative about it, but if I think I'm better off not talking on this forum, I will. Thanks for your advice.

OK, here we go. I feel that it would be not the best decision for you to just stop coming to these forums. We ALL learn something about ourselves every day. We ALL make mistakes every day. We are ALL human after all. Your contributions are just as important as any other on SS. You deserve to be heard, and you have the obligation to hear others, as well. We all do. We're here to help others, and ourselves, if we can, and comfort people if we must, and just listen when we are unable to do either of those things. Stick around and let's see what comes next!