nihilism

[candytree]

honestly i love that everyone hates me because i get a unique life perspective that not everyone has the opportunity to have. i'm ugly im brown i'm miserable i can't socialize at all and nobody likes me i've always felt like i was nothing and i need to die so i can fully embrace nothing. also before i ctb should i do some xanax and shove a bunch of needles in my face to make a statement cause i'm feeling yes.

 

[A simple aid]

Mmmm....i find that quite interesting....i doubt ur statement concerning ur universal lack of appeal to people...and i think you see easily recoverable...after all being on this site you should have found at least one person you have some connection with...ryt?

 

[candytree]

Mmmm....i find that quite interesting....i doubt ur statement concerning ur universal lack of appeal to people...and i think you see easily recoverable...after all being on this site you should have found at least one person you have some connection with...ryt?

ok first of y'all you don't know me and second of all im so sick and tired of people invalidating me and telling me im not going. to kill myself when i am recovery is not an option for me because i am literally nothing and everyone hates me this is the only thing i can do to get any peace and to stop cutting and starving myself everyday

 

[A simple aid]

ok first of y'all you don't know me and second of all im so sick and tired of people invalidating me and telling me im not going. to kill myself when i am recovery is not an option for me because i am literally nothing and everyone hates me this is the only thing i can do to get any peace and to stop cutting and starving myself everyday

cool cool cool.......i understand people dont take you seriously on your stance to end yourself....that not the people here they aid you in doing so...so that not the issue.....u say yall but its only me...so u mean it in reference to people in collective those who are relatively the reason for your state...perhaps all the people who scream get better and such....now when you say peace you mean the demons or thoughts in your head are incessant....so ill ask you to distract yourself a bit...and tell the cruel world your tale before you go

 

[aladdin]

honestly i love that everyone hates me because i get a unique life perspective that not everyone has the opportunity to have. i'm ugly im brown i'm miserable i can't socialize at all and nobody likes me i've always felt like i was nothing and i need to die so i can fully embrace nothing. also before i ctb should i do some xanax and shove a bunch of needles in my face to make a statement cause i'm feeling yes.

why would you want to ctb because you're brown? I think tan is really hot. I wish I was more tan. I hate how pale I get in the winters.

 

[candytree]

cool cool cool.......i understand people dont take you seriously on your stance to end yourself....that not the people here they aid you in doing so...so that not the issue.....u say yall but its only me...so u mean it in reference to people in collective those who are relatively the reason for your state...perhaps all the people who scream get better and such....now when you say peace you mean the demons or thoughts in your head are incessant....so ill ask you to distract yourself a bit...and tell the cruel world your tale before you go

oh i plan on it im killing myself in my "friends" car and lighting it on fire then on snapchat i'm exposing every single person that was at that birthday party because they're all hypocrites and have done more embarrassing things than me. anyways thanks for listening to my problems

why would you want to ctb because you're brown? I think tan is really hot. I wish I was more tan. I hate how pale I get in the winters.

no one finds you attractive and you'll never make any friends it's not just being brown it's the ethnic features too and i have extremely high standards for myself this is never how i imagined my life would be but i can only meet those standards after i die.

 

[FuneralCry]

Other people will never be able to understand what you go through as after all they are not living your life and cannot experience life from the same point of view as you. It's best to take no notice of those who invalidate suffering. I get that it can be so awful having to endure a life that you hate so I hope that you find the peace that you are looking for.

 

[makethepainstop]

honestly i love that everyone hates me because i get a unique life perspective that not everyone has the opportunity to have. i'm ugly im brown i'm miserable i can't socialize at all and nobody likes me i've always felt like i was nothing and i need to die so i can fully embrace nothing. also before i ctb should i do some xanax and shove a bunch of needles in my face to make a statement cause i'm feeling yes.

Part of my reason for wanting to die is that I am white, but I am not platinum blond, with blue eyes, 6'8 and about 280 pounds of solid muscle. So I hate me being regular sized,with dark hair and eye color. I guess we all struggle with what we think we should look like. Much love and a firm 3 minute hug to you.

 

[WithoutMyTrueFriend]

Not even the most evil people in the history of mankind can get everyone to hate them, so I doubt you can pull off that feature.
But it is very understandable and relatable how past experiences can make one feel that way.
And I can understand how nihilism can seem tempting in those moments. But suffering matters. Yours and everyones else. Even if it isn't written on the leaves of trees or whatever is required to be an absolute truth. It matters to the people experiencing it.
I hope things will become better for you. Please take care, regardless of what direction you choose.

 

[A simple aid]

oh i plan on it im killing myself in my "friends" car and lighting it on fire then on snapchat i'm exposing every single person that was at that birthday party because they're all hypocrites and have done more embarrassing things than me. anyways thanks for listening to my problems

no one finds you attractive and you'll never make any friends it's not just being brown it's the ethnic features too and i have extremely high standards for myself this is never how i imagined my life would be but i can only meet those standards after i die.

Yaaaaaaayyyyyy ive seen the problem.....well i dont know when your attempting your stuff so maybe before or after we can talk about your high standards......im happy to see youre scared by society more so than nature...societal scars are easier to deal with

Part of my reason for wanting to die is that I am white, but I am not platinum blond, with blue eyes, 6'8 and about 280 pounds of solid muscle. So I hate me being regular sized,with dark hair and eye color. I guess we all struggle with what we think we should look like. Much love and a firm 3 minute hug to you.

lol

Other people will never be able to understand what you go through as after all they are not living your life and cannot experience life from the same point of view as you. It's best to take no notice of those who invalidate suffering. I get that it can be so awful having to endure a life that you hate so I hope that you find the peace that you are looking for.

as good as those words are....id say ur better off surrounding yourself with people who understand your pain and best as possible and if not even that ...care for you enough to help you manage deal with.... distract you.... or overcome

Not even the most evil people in the history of mankind can get everyone to hate them, so I doubt you can pull off that feature.
But it is very understandable and relatable how past experiences can make one feel that way.
And I can understand how nihilism can seem tempting in those moments. But suffering matters. Yours and everyones else. Even if it isn't written on the leaves of trees or whatever is required to be an absolute truth. It matters to the people experiencing it.
I hope things will become better for you. Please take care, regardless of what direction you choose.

nice response....

Part of my reason for wanting to die is that I am white, but I am not platinum blond, with blue eyes, 6'8 and about 280 pounds of solid muscle. So I hate me being regular sized,with dark hair and eye color. I guess we all struggle with what we think we should look like. Much love and a firm 3 minute hug to you.

and my dear white boy....im sure if he was surrounded by people who appreciated whatever he is he wouldnt have need for being some 6ft 8 behemoth....it would have never popped in his minded from childhood to now....all this is external influence....the success of others ...media...entertainment etc....the road to peace if some may find it usually starts with acceptance then contentment....but thats for those who have some hope for life or are bored and willing to try

 

[candytree]

Not even the most evil people in the history of mankind can get everyone to hate them, so I doubt you can pull off that feature.
But it is very understandable and relatable how past experiences can make one feel that way.
And I can understand how nihilism can seem tempting in those moments. But suffering matters. Yours and everyones else. Even if it isn't written on the leaves of trees or whatever is required to be an absolute truth. It matters to the people experiencing it.
I hope things will become better for you. Please take care, regardless of what direction you choose.

everyone that mattered to me dropped me like i was nothing i don't understand how anyone could genuinely like me though cause i have no personality and no looks to fall back on im literally nothing and just waiting death atp

 

[Barteljaap]

Not even the most evil people in the history of mankind can get everyone to hate them, so I doubt you can pull off that feature.

That's only because when you think about the most evil people in history, you are only thinking about hyper-charismatic leaders who gained power and used it to do bad things.

I'm sure there were plenty of people just as evil as A.H. (for example) but simply did not have even 1% of his charisma. Interpersonal Skills > Morality when it comes to being liked. I have seen in my life that many people would rather deal with a charming person who is trying to scam them, than a socially awkward person with good intentions.

 

[WithoutMyTrueFriend]

everyone that mattered to me dropped me like i was nothing i don't understand how anyone could genuinely like me though cause i have no personality and no looks to fall back on im literally nothing and just waiting death atp

That sucks, everyone left :(
If you need someone to hear your story, I will gladly lend an ear.

That's only because when you think about the most evil people in history, you are only thinking about hyper-charismatic leaders who gained power and used it to do bad things.

I'm sure there were plenty of people just as evil as A.H. (for example) but simply did not have even 1% of his charisma. Interpersonal Skills > Morality when it comes to being liked. I have seen in my life that many people would rather deal with a charming person who is trying to scam them, than a socially awkward person with good intentions.

There is always going to be someone, who wants the best for a person, no matter what they have done or what they do. Regardless of charisma.
But yes, charisma plays a great part in how much a person is being liked. It is, what it is. I don't think someones worth comes down to what other people think.

 

[theboy]

Should I be happy or sad for this?

 

[Regret]

no one finds you attractive and you'll never make any friends it's not just being brown it's the ethnic features too and i have extremely high standards for myself this is never how i imagined my life would be but i can only meet those standards after i die.

That kills me that you hate being brown and want to die because of it. That sucks — I'm sorry. Have you ever considered living in a place with a lot of brown people so you don't feel different or ugly. Idk just an idea… idk if it'll help— I just wondered…