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greyhound

greyhound

Arcanist
Oct 8, 2020
471
So I think I found another effective method for overcoming SI.

TLDR: Get addicted to opiates, and then stop using them cold turkey, you will want to kill yourself.

I was originally planning to CTB mid Oct. I have N and had been pretty much been hanging on all summer to visit with someone in early Oct.
I had been using opiates on and off before, but since I was about to CTB I was like fuck it who cares if I develop a physical addiction at this point.

So I basically have been using daily since Sept. But turns out a bunch of family are coming for xmas and it's like damn I might as well hold out for that. So I needed to kick the opiates for now. They say one of the side effects of quitting cold turkey is suicidal thoughts and they aren't kidding.

I don't want to say it is as bad as hollywood makes it out to be. I was worried it would be full on trainspotting hallucinating dead babies. Or the North Water (excellent series worth checking out) grown man crying when the laudanum runs out. It wasn't that bad. Still very unpleasant and if you needed that extra push to eliminate SI I think it would do quite nicely. If I didn't have these family obligations I would have easily chugged down the N and been done with it.

Of course the downside is if you decide to not kill yourself you now have to kick opiates and get your shit back together. YMMV.
 
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S

setup

Experienced
Nov 18, 2021
279
You know, idk if this is a good idea.
 
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deathbyginger

deathbyginger

Student
Oct 24, 2019
114
lol kinda accurate.

I starting using opiates after my first suicide attempt, as an escape and form of self-harm. I was hoping that eventually I'd take too much and OD unexpectedly. Started on pills - oxycodone and dihydrocodeine specifically. Tolerance builds fast when you use them like you want to die. I started using heroin and fentadope after a couple months. After finally overdosing, and receiving intervention, that's when I wanted to die more than ever. Wish I could've just taken the SN at that point I could've stomached it.

Important consideration, this would be more effective for methods not involving ingestion. The nausea & vomiting is the worst.

Wishing you a good recovery. Luckily the physical withdrawal doesn't last more than week, depending on your DoC of course.
 
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Ethereal Knight

Ethereal Knight

Seja um bom soldado, morra onde você caiu.
Jan 10, 2022
816
interesting. drugs are very powerful.

I have another suggestion: taking Trazodone to overcome SI. it really seems to work. you don't even need to be taking trazodone constantly or to have ever taken it, just 100-200mg on the day before the CTB if you're gonna CTB in the morning or in the morning if you're gonna CTB at night, and it'll probably be so much easier to do it. it has to do with basically two things: (1) one of its metabolites (called mCPP, or meta-chlorophenylpiprazine) can cause a very bad dysphoria and depression, and (2) the emotional blunting, emotional dullness or "robotization" that antidepressants in general cause can really help to be cold-blooded during the CTB.
 
J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
That sounds scary I was thinking of this however I'm too scared if I fail to CTB again I'll have way too many issues
 

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