Never say goodbye to someone the moment before the attempt to ctb

[Zzzzz]

They will immediately call the police/ambulance on you. You will not die. You will be resuscitated. "Saved"against your will. Taken as a prisoner to a psych ward. Unless you are using a method that cannot be resuscitated. Like jumping from a skyscraper. (Not a 6 story apartment building) If it's a 300-400+ foot tall behemoth, Humpty Dumpty is not being put back together again. Unless you are wearing a parachute on the way down. (Which should not be worn for a ctb attempt) We cannot literally say goodbye to our loved ones , but we can tell them we love them , appreciate,etc whatever you want to say, just NOT GOODBYE. and don't say it minutes before the attempt, or it might sound suspicious. And you still might get resuscitated against your will. Better to say it days/weeks before.

Also, Never tell anyone you have plans to ctb or are actively suicidal. If you are serious about ctb and not recovery, always tell others you might be struggling but are not thinking about ctb. It is extremely rare for someone to 1. Have enough selflessness to actually respect someone else's bodily autonomy over their own desires and 2. Have enough intelligence/understanding to know that you are not being irrational and are most likely in fact making a rational decision. Even people who believe in the right to die are not safe to confide in because they might only believe that the physically ill have that right and not the "mentally" Ill.

 

[A_miStake_of_NATURE]

I told my family. Nothing happened. I guess I'm not being taken seriously. I don't care, really. They'll take me seriously afterwards. But you're right. It's safer not to tell anyone in your inner circle. It's better to remain discreet.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

I really don't tell people, but, I have been this way for so long, everyone who knows me sees it as "normal". When the time arrives for me to leave by my own hand, yes, people will be sad. But not a single person who knows me will be shocked or surprised. Everyone saw this coming years ago....

 

[FuneralCry]

Ideally I want to ctb as far away from other people as I possibly can. I would never tell anyone as they would not accept and understand my decision. We have the right to exit this world at a time of our choosing and we have no obligations to stay alive as we did not ask to exist. I wish society would respect this. It is selfish to expect people to suffer for decades.

 

[Following Enoch]

They will immediately call the police/ambulance on you. You will not die. You will be resuscitated. "Saved"against your will. Taken as a prisoner to a psych ward. Unless you are using a method that cannot be resuscitated. Like jumping from a skyscraper. (Not a 6 story apartment building) If it's a 300-400+ foot tall behemoth, Humpty Dumpty is not being put back together again. Unless you are wearing a parachute on the way down. (Which should not be worn for a ctb attempt) We cannot literally say goodbye to our loved ones , but we can tell them we love them , appreciate,etc whatever you want to say, just NOT GOODBYE. and don't say it minutes before the attempt, or it might sound suspicious. And you still might get resuscitated against your will. Better to say it days/weeks before.

Also, Never tell anyone you have plans to ctb or are actively suicidal. If you are serious about ctb and not recovery, always tell others you might be struggling but are not thinking about ctb. It is extremely rare for someone to 1. Have enough selflessness to actually respect someone else's bodily autonomy over their own desires and 2. Have enough intelligence/understanding to know that you are not being irrational and are most likely in fact making a rational decision. Even people who believe in the right to die are not safe to confide in because they might only believe that the physically ill have that right and not the "mentally" Ill.

That's great advice Zzzzzz and very relevant to my thought processes recently. One side of me desperately wants to tell my f&f to say goodbye, but I know that any attempt to do that will be met with an attempt by them to stop me. So I haven't told them I'm contemplating suicide, but I have told them that I don't think suicide is a bad idea if it delivers us from a worse fate. In fact the other day I asked my mum "do you think the people who jumped from the burning WTC committed suicide?" and she answered "no because they were about to die anyway, they just chose the less painful option". And so I replied, therefore as death is guaranteed anyway, ending your own life isn't so much as self-murder as taking control of an inevitable scenario to ensure it happens on your terms. She totally got that and therefore I hope that thought is still in her mind, should the very sad day comes that she receives the news that I ctb.

 

[Zzzzz]

That's great advice Zzzzzz and very relevant to my thought processes recently. One side of me desperately wants to tell my f&f to say goodbye, but I know that any attempt to do that will be met with an attempt by them to stop me. So I haven't told them I'm contemplating suicide, but I have told them that I don't think suicide is a bad idea if it delivers us from a worse fate. In fact the other day I asked my mum "do you think the people who jumped from the burning WTC committed suicide?" and she answered "no because they were about to die anyway, they just chose the less painful option". And so I replied, therefore as death is guaranteed anyway, ending your own life isn't so much as self-murder as taking control of an inevitable scenario to ensure it happens on your terms. She totally got that and therefore I hope that thought is still in her mind, should the very sad day comes that she receives the news that I ctb.

Very true and well said about suicide being a way to have some control over our own inevitable deaths. Many people seem to agree with that logic but they still would never support a family member/friend or loved ones choice to suicide. Because they are thinking about how it would affect them.

 

[Following Enoch]

Very true and well said about suicide being a way to have some control over our own inevitable deaths. Many people seem to agree with that logic but they still would never support a family member/friend or loved ones choice to suicide. Because they are thinking about how it would affect them.

Yes, that's true too. I guess, until recently, I would have felt the same in their shoes. There is almost a sense of moral culpability, knowing someone is going to do it and not attempting to stop them, which I can also understand. That's why I agree that despite the desperate desire to say farewell to loved ones, it just isn't an option. Life is so fucked up, the more I think about it the more appealing death becomes.

 

[NaughtyGirl]

I feel bad because even though I understand there are people who are just stupid and/or who completely lack common sense meaning it's always valuable to repeat the basics, it still somehow annoys me that this piece of common sense needs to be shared. "Don't tell people're you're basically killing yourself right now, if you're actually killing yourself right now and want to succeed". It's like "don't jump into the water if you don't want to get wet" type of advice really. And even though I know it has its place it still somehow rubs me in the wrong way xD. Stupid brain.

By the way, saying good bye is not a problem, just write a letter and put it in a place that will be discovered sooner or later.

 

[ChobaniFlipSmores]

So yeah...I was planning to attempt calling my therapist and one friend using a semi untraceable phone call (satellite VOIP number through a VPN) while being up on a mountain with limited access. *Shrug*

 

[Chockles]

My elderly parents support my need to die even tho it makes them sad they simply can't cope seeing me bed ridden & suffering in agony. I'm hoping to acquire golden ticket out of here soon. Has to be at home while they're in bed so 12hr window max but they want to hold my hand like an assisted suicide the night I decide to go. I simply cannot allow that to happen. My SI would kick in with mum crying her eyes out. I also don't want to implicate them anymore than necessary. It'll be hard enough for them afterwards in our small community where everyone knows everyone else & their friends just know I'm chronically physically ill.