Discussion Naming people in suicide note?

[sserafim]

I originally didn't want to write a note, but now I'm thinking about writing one. Is it a good idea to name people in it?

 

[dggtscccvfd]

W

I originally didn't want to write a note, but now I'm thinking about writing one. Is it a good idea to name people in it?

Yes. I have included specific anecdotes for family members to remember me by.

 

[sserafim]

W

Yes. I have included specific anecdotes for family members to remember me by.

What about people that you hate? I was thinking of naming them in mine

 

[dggtscccvfd]

What about people that you hate? I was thinking of naming them in mine

I don't see why not. I don't hate anybody though.

 

[Helween]

depend what you say in it and how you want them to feel reading it, tbh i think a good idea even if what you have to say hurt a bit.

 

[Silent Raindrops]

If you're planning to ctb because someone wronged you, or just people who wronged you in the past, I wouldn't.

If it's saying something like "tell him/her I love them and I'm sorry ", that might be ok.

But don't do it to place the blame on anyone. It'll just cause more issues in the future. If they know you ctb because of them, it'll haunt them enough.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

It's not a good idea if you plan to submit it to the public but if you really must make certain people aware of what role they played without any ambiguity then it's possible.

 

[sserafim]

It's not a good idea if you plan to submit it to the public but if you really must make certain people aware of what role they played without any ambiguity then it's possible.

What if I send it to them directly?

 

[Little_Suzy]

They should be named and shamed. Fck 'em!!! lol

 

[willitpass]

Unless someone severely and intentionally hurt you, I'm talking years of abuse or something like assault or SA, I wouldn't advise it. Forcing someone to carry the guilt of someone's death because they were a bit of a bitch or weren't the best person in your life seems unbelievably cruel. Telling someone they contributed to your suicide is an incredible burden and one so big I have no intention of ever leaving it on anyone. There is only one person I believe had any contribution to my mental health (I personally don't blame people for my own death, I prefer to take personal accountability, she is the one exception) and rather than give her a note saying she contributed I prefer to simply leave a note to everyone but her. She is not even worth my words.

 

[Unknown21]

I see no objection to doing this. Naming people positively or negatively helps to define.

 

[sserafim]

I see no objection to doing this. Naming people positively or negatively helps to define.

I'm thinking about naming someone negatively

 

[dggtscccvfd]

I'm thinking about naming someone negatively

Then do it.

 

[Unknown21]

I'm thinking about naming someone negatively

There is no harm in mentioning those who caused or contributed to your suicidal thoughts or caused your suffering in a negative way and blaming them for that. You have the right to do so.

 

[melancholymallory03]

I originally didn't want to write a note, but now I'm thinking about writing one. Is it a good idea to name people in it?

This is a tricky situation , I can see how you'd want to mention them to give them an insight into your mental state and what led up to this ….

But I can also see what other commenters are saying how this may induce further trauma. ..

Personally, I think you should worry about yourself regarding your attempt, as long as you're not directly hurting anyone and intentionally . I'd take the burden off yourself and also take as much time as you need with you're note if possible , because this is you're " last words " to most people , so they will be quite interested in how you were feeling , and how they could of done better perhaps .

i hope if you write one you're able to express yourself fully without fearing the judgement of others , you are entitled to peace and I hope you get there soon. 🕊

 

[Throwawayacc3]

What if I send it to them directly?

I've thought about this. You're going to like the logical aspect. Yes I've had thoughts of putting in names of people that did shit things to me in the past. And no I wouldn't care if it haunted them - I was nothing but nice and kind to them and their fuckign parents who I met and they still bullied me for "popularity" guys a cunt. Anyway:

Have a single document converted to PDF which instructions on whether comes across it. Each file will be either USB or uploaded and have a password for each recipient. Be clear that the institutions must be followed as the main PDF - people who don't follow someone's last wishes aren't going to do well if they don't.

That's what I would do. Plus my hand writing when emotional is a mess but when I hyperfocus it looks like Picasso lmao.

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

I hate many people with a passion. The only circumstance I would posthumously inform any one of them of this, is only if I was sure that it would cause them guilt, pain and suffering. But the way I see it, if I hate someone, there's a high probability that they hate me as well. And letting a person I hate know that I hated them would naturally lead them to believe that they are partly attributable for my death. And I think that would give them a sense of satisfaction more than anything. Which is the last feeling that I would want someone that I hate, to have.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

What if I send it to them directly?

That should be fine then, makes it easier to tell them whatever they need to hear.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I first wanted to kill myself when I was 10 in direct response to someone I suspect was/is a narcissist. At the time, yes, I did think about naming them in the note.

I think it's worth bearing in mind though that- if the person that wronged you is that bad- they probably aren't capable of feeling remorse the same way 'normal' people are. People like narcissists have their own narratives going on in their heads where they are the victims. They are the ones being persecuted. This could just play into that- that this wicked person has gone to their grave with the sole intention of turning people against them. Which in fact is something they do a lot.

Now, I wouldn't name them. They're not directly responsible anymore but- they were certainly the start of all this. I just content myself that my closest friends know. One of them in particular lived through it with me. Plus, other family members know deep down. It can't change anything though. That time's gone- the damage is done. As for the person themselves, I reckon they'll just keep on living with their gandiose ego.

I just feel like- if these people have a negative view of you in life. Which- I imagine is part of it- it must be to treat us so poorly, I'm not sure why that would change in death so they suddenly start to feel guilty. Maybe it would reveal to others what they're like- which might trouble them more but, they're good at creating their own narratives and people probably do know anyway.

It probably depends if this person really is being mallicious towards you. Is their intention to hurt you? Do they then deserve to be made to feel guilty?

 

[ms_beaverhousen]

I originally didn't want to write a note, but now I'm thinking about writing one. Is it a good idea to name people in it?

Like friends and family or mental/medical professional, or even associates? I say yeah. Let truth be known and maybe something can come from it.

 

[billie]

I originally didn't want to write a note, but now I'm thinking about writing one. Is it a good idea to name people in it?

Maybe I'll write a note and mention the people who are responsible for my death and who are not responsible for my death

 

[ringo99]

If they deserve all the shit that'll happen to them as a result of it, yes.

 

[sserafim]

If they deserve all the shit that'll happen to them as a result of it, yes.

I think he'll be happy about how he drove me to suicide though

I first wanted to kill myself when I was 10 in direct response to someone I suspect was/is a narcissist. At the time, yes, I did think about naming them in the note.

I think it's worth bearing in mind though that- if the person that wronged you is that bad- they probably aren't capable of feeling remorse the same way 'normal' people are. People like narcissists have their own narratives going on in their heads where they are the victims. They are the ones being persecuted. This could just play into that- that this wicked person has gone to their grave with the sole intention of turning people against them. Which in fact is something they do a lot.

Now, I wouldn't name them. They're not directly responsible anymore but- they were certainly the start of all this. I just content myself that my closest friends know. One of them in particular lived through it with me. Plus, other family members know deep down. It can't change anything though. That time's gone- the damage is done. As for the person themselves, I reckon they'll just keep on living with their gandiose ego.

I just feel like- if these people have a negative view of you in life. Which- I imagine is part of it- it must be to treat us so poorly, I'm not sure why that would change in death so they suddenly start to feel guilty. Maybe it would reveal to others what they're like- which might trouble them more but, they're good at creating their own narratives and people probably do know anyway.

It probably depends if this person really is being mallicious towards you. Is their intention to hurt you? Do they then deserve to be made to feel guilty?

Yeah, I think it was his intention to hurt me. He was a troll on this forum lol. I stalked him on another one and he said that he already got this British girl to ctb

 

[MyTimeIsUp]

he said that he already got this British girl to ctb

And now you're doing it, because of him? That doesn't make sense, especially when you know he already got someone else to do it. What an awful piece of shit he is. I'm so sorry he's caused you so much suffering, you deserve so much better.

If I knew who it was, I would fucking report the piece of shit. He should be punished for this, because he will keep doing it, until someone speaks up.

 

[Linda]

What about people that you hate? I was thinking of naming them in mine

That would just demean you, and your memory. I think it would be better to name the people you want to say something nice about, but remain silent about the others. Naming people you hate probably wouldn't make the world a better place for others, and it might make it worse. Not a good legacy.

 

[sserafim]

I think he'll be happy about how he drove me to suicide though

Yeah, I think it was his intention to hurt me. He was a troll on this forum lol. I stalked him on another one and he said that he already got this British girl to ctb

He already deleted his account

 

[Linda]

I think he'll be happy about how he drove me to suicide though

Yeah, I think it was his intention to hurt me. He was a troll on this forum lol. I stalked him on another one and he said that he already got this British girl to ctb"

"he said that he already got this British girl to ctb...." Sounds like something that should be reported to law enforcement, if you know what country he is from. He might try to do it to someone else. Everyone here is pro-choice, but no legitimate member is pro-murder.