Venting my therapist told me im asking for too much.

[bloodyknuckles]

all i asked for was therapy twice a week. before i turned 18 i was getting it and now its seemingly impossible without money. im broke as fuck im getting 1k from the government and thats it it covers my rent and thats it. i just wanna be better and get better but i advocate and advocate and ive called helplines and info lines and mental health resource lines and theyre telling me theyve done everything they can. the lady on the phone literally told me to stop calling cause ive been told about every resource there is. i got seen by police yesterday and they said they would advocate but they arent. the only thing i have in place is one therapy session in late june. thats it. im really losing hope and i used to be scared of suicide and killing myself and death in general but im getting so desperate that my pain is stronger than my fear and im considering full suspension hanging before the 31st of may. suffering, trauma and abuse my whole life and it amounts to this. im nothing.

 

[Helio_Helio]

I'm broke too, and I can't afford therapy either, so I understand how you feel.

There's not really any solution. None I know of at least. Some places might offer a free session here and there but they won't be all that effective, at least in my opinion.

If it may help, you can always talk and post about your feelings online. I've went through some lengthy periods of insanity with venting online as my only option... It was obviously not the best thing for me, but it did kept me barely afloat.

Please take care not to be tricked, please do not be fooled into relationships either, and if you can: please first give yourself strong personal boundaries.

I have a depression self help book that I find relatively useful, <The Field Guide for Depression> from Therapy Notebooks that I very occasionally use but I find the do-it-yourself CBT, DBT, and other tools in it to be quite useful and pretty much what a therapy session would contain except obviously a book cannot grant advice like a person. Alternatively you can always try to search up workbooks online...

 

[cvury]

life is pay to win jfl

no money no happiness. u ask for help and instead you get thrown hundreds of dollars of copay fees your way.

 

[SomeDude]

First of all, fuck the system. The system won't always help you. What I've personally learned is that the people who helped me the most were the ones who understood what I was going through because they had been through similar things themselves.
That's why I'm really grateful I found this forum. I found people here who think the same way I do, who struggle with similar problems, and honestly, talking to people who truly understand your pain can help a lot more than talking to someone who only knows it from textbooks.

A lot of professionals probably do have useful advice, but many of them are behind paywalls or systems that are hard to access, and sometimes they don't have that personal connection or understanding of what it actually feels like to go trough this stuff.
So my advice to you is: try talking to people here who are going through similar things. They may be able to give you support, understanding, and advice in a way that feels more real and personal.

To be honest, I tried to ctb myself, however I am a coward and I am somewhat thankful for that since afterwards I've met people on here who gave me hope, who gave me a perspective for life. I think we all lack some kind of connection. No one wants to ctb themselves. We all want some kind of happiness in the form of connection to other people and thats what we should pursue.