Venting My selfish wish

[Ameya]

Suicide is not selfish. This is just how I feel and not based on fact, but my emotions. People who commit suicide are not selfish.

Now that this is out of the way.


I am tired. I'm living for other people and not myself. I tried doing it for myself, but I can't. I am a failure and can't bring much to the table. I am just alive, because of other people. But I am getting tired. I have no strength left. I want to end it so bad. I'm getting desperate of finding a right way to do it. I want to be selfish now. I want to die. I will bring other people down with me. Not by choice, but by accident. I don't want to threaten anything to anyone, but I can't keep myself together. I'm ao tired.

I want to die even if its selfish of me

 

[FuneralCry]

I do understand that it can be difficult to carry on existing when you feel so tired of everything and all that you wish for is to leave. I could never personally stay alive only for others, that would be unbearable for me. I just think that grief and loss are a part of life, we will all die eventually and lose everything someday, it's simply inevitable. And it's the most selfish thing for others to expect us to continue to endure a life that we never asked for in the first place, they have no right to try to force people to stay here, suicide is a personal decision that only the individual can make.
But I hope that you find the freedom that you wish for.

 

[Pluto]

This is sadly a very common scenario on here. Sad because it is a lack of selfishness that seems to be a direct pathway to death, and it does not have to be this way.

Common examples:
* 'Parentified' youth, who were given adult responsibilities from a young age and never learned to care for themselves
* Mistreated young people who are brainwashed to take the blame for their own trauma
* Single or overburdened parents who are unable to cope with the endless pressures placed upon them
* Young people who have been raised with the expectation that they achieve success to bring prestige to the family
* People who have an identity that is unsupported by their culture, forcing them to try and fit in

Sometimes, such people have an epiphany just by having someone point out that nobody has ever supported them, and this is not right. It's always been about pleasing other people with endless expectations.

Whatever you do, now is the time to focus on being 'selfish'. Silence the outside world. Block out the noise of other people and make whatever decisions are really true for you.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

Suicide is selfish. It's about you and only you. That is what it is. It's inherent in the act. There's nothing wrong with that. After a lot of contemplation and self-reflection, if you decide that is what's best for you, that is what's best for YOU. It's not about anyone else.

 

[Dominicka]

For a long time, I lived for others before I realized how f'd up that is. Now, I'm not staying alive for other people, I'm staying alive for my cat. She's the only reason I'm still here. Once she goes, I go. If I can make it that long.