After my mum passes away which could be up to 20 years from now I plan to buy argon gas (2.1m3) and also a welder to avoid questioning then order an argon flowmeter regulator and hose. I'll write notes to everyone close to me and state I want a direct cremation. I will make an exit bag then once it's all ready I'll write a note and put it in my neighbours mailbox at night stating that I've committed suicide. I'll put all my money in an envelope and put it in my sisters mailbox along with the suicide note.
I told my mum what I plan to do after she passes away and she understands because we're very close and I'll lose all will to live when she's gone but that's not the only reason. I look ugly and I haven't hung out with a friend for nearly 5 years because I isolated myself due to the fear of being judged. I have no hope of getting a girlfriend so I'll be a virgin forever unless I pay. I'm quite dumb and stupid but I'm also very self conscious of it so I notice co-workers talking about me behind my back etc. I hate working so much mostly because of that reason and that's why I've been unemployed for half a year. I'm going to try working as an apple picker but that's only about 2 months work a year. I'm taking fluoxetine and seeing a counselor at the moment for my body image issues but even if I didn't have those issues I still can't handle working all my life especially because I'm self conscious of my slowness.
I told my mum what I plan to do after she passes away and she understands because we're very close and I'll lose all will to live when she's gone but that's not the only reason. I look ugly and I haven't hung out with a friend for nearly 5 years because I isolated myself due to the fear of being judged. I have no hope of getting a girlfriend so I'll be a virgin forever unless I pay. I'm quite dumb and stupid but I'm also very self conscious of it so I notice co-workers talking about me behind my back etc. I hate working so much mostly because of that reason and that's why I've been unemployed for half a year. I'm going to try working as an apple picker but that's only about 2 months work a year. I'm taking fluoxetine and seeing a counselor at the moment for my body image issues but even if I didn't have those issues I still can't handle working all my life especially because I'm self conscious of my slowness.
