Venting My passion for drawing is dying and it sucksssss so much (╥_╥)

[kawaiiphantom]

This past month or two is the first time in years that I haven't felt like drawing at all. I love art and it's a huge passion of mine but unfortunately everything is so much more bland lately and depression getting very severe. It hurts me because art is my favorite thing in life. I used to draw everyday but even the thought of drawing now makes me feel sick and I have no clue why. I've been able to crank out 3 drawings in past month but I had to force myself and they didn't take much time. I hope my desire to draw returns because it was one of the things that defined me and allowed me to express myself. It was also a huge crutch for me and kept my mental health afloat. I miss it so fucking much. It's also like my only source of income but since I can't draw anymore I have to lose that unfortunately, I doubt I'll get more commissions. Thank you for reading this

 

[Kewan]

I guess i feel the same. I learnt how to play the piano when i was 10 and since then i got very passionate about it. When my depression wasn´t really bad, playing the piano was the only thing that made me feel happy and i used to play everyday and enjoying it. When i began to feel depressed i started to play the piano like a resource to make me feel better, and i ended up feeling frustrated because i wasn´t able to escape all my emotional problems with it. Eventually i stopped enjoying it because i was desperate to feeling better. I realised that all the things i was doing in my routine were oriented to avoid my reality, not really because i enjoyed doing it. I want to play the piano again like i used to, but i want to do it on better circumstances, i don´t want to put the weight of my mental health on it because i won´t enjoy it. So i know if i manage to improve a bit my situation i´ll be able to enjoy music again.

 

[d3ad]

Aw, I am really sorry to hear that. One of the worst things about depression and other illnesses, is that, it can take away your interests and abilities to do things. It is not a permanent thing though. You have to address the root issue first (which seems to be depression in your case) and find a way to treat it. I wish you all the best, and hope that things will work out for you.

 

[Caramelized]

This is too relatable (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ) Sounds like a good ol' case of anhedonia (lack of interest/pleasure in things that you once enjoyed, common symptom of depression)....I really liked drawing too, I still do! ♡ When I felt like I was losing everything else around me, I still had drawing. It made me happy....so happy. It was something that I could be proud of. It was something that gave me motivation to keep going in my life that otherwise felt like it wasn't worth living. Posting my art online made things even cooler! (*´꒳`*)



Depression always seems to catch up with you, though....and before I knew it....I don't feel much of anything drawing anymore. Taking breaks didn't help. Trying to fight through the depression and keep drawing didn't help....It's been at least three years that I've felt like this....From drawing multiple pieces a day to maybe one or two every few months now ( ◞‸◟ )

I know what I just said about how taking breaks didn't help me (¯∇¯٥) but maybe you're different! What is it about drawing that you really like? Is it drawing fan art of your favorite characters? Watching your ideas become a reality on paper/screen? Maybe you just like how at peace you feel doing it! ⸜( * ^꒳ ^* )⸝ Maybe you could try focusing on those things. Just take a while to forget about the aspects of creating art that may stress you out like social media engagement and commissions and try to remember what you loved about art so much....what about it excited you. I wish there was something more insightful that I could say, I don't want to see anyone else lose their passions to anhedonia.
( ´•_•。) I hope you can get through it.

Anyway, your profile is very cute, and I'd love to see your art sometime! (｡•◡•｡)⸝⋆

 

[kawaiiphantom]

This is too relatable (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ) Sounds like a good ol' case of anhedonia (lack of interest/pleasure in things that you once enjoyed, common symptom of depression)....I really liked drawing too, I still do! ♡ When I felt like I was losing everything else around me, I still had drawing. It made me happy....so happy. It was something that I could be proud of. It was something that gave me motivation to keep going in my life that otherwise felt like it wasn't worth living. Posting my art online made things even cooler! (*´꒳`*)



Depression always seems to catch up with you, though....and before I knew it....I don't feel much of anything drawing anymore. Taking breaks didn't help. Trying to fight through the depression and keep drawing didn't help....It's been at least three years that I've felt like this....From drawing multiple pieces a day to maybe one or two every few months now ( ◞‸◟ )

I know what I just said about how taking breaks didn't help me (¯∇¯٥) but maybe you're different! What is it about drawing that you really like? Is it drawing fan art of your favorite characters? Watching your ideas become a reality on paper/screen? Maybe you just like how at peace you feel doing it! ⸜( * ^꒳ ^* )⸝ Maybe you could try focusing on those things. Just take a while to forget about the aspects of creating art that may stress you out like social media engagement and commissions and try to remember what you loved about art so much....what about it excited you. I wish there was something more insightful that I could say, I don't want to see anyone else lose their passions to anhedonia.
( ´•_•。) I hope you can get through it.

Anyway, your profile is very cute, and I'd love to see your art sometime! (｡•◡•｡)⸝⋆

awhhhh thank u so much for your reply (─‿‿─)♡ !!! Dude I relate to that first paragraph so much ;w; it really kept me sane when I was feeling at my most horrible. Hmmm I think what I like most about drawing is the escape from reality it gives me, also expressing emotions through art and hoping it will help other people that might feel similar to me

also I think that's a really good idea~ thank you so much (づ◡﹏◡)づ I think I tend to get too wrapped up in the numbers when I've posted my art before so I think that would be good to focus my attention off of that aspect, and like you said focus on what originally made me passionate about it :]

I'm sorry you've been feeling that way for so long :'< I bet your art is still amazing though ( ⸝⸝•ᴗ•⸝⸝ )੭⁾⁾ it's awful to have lost passion for something you used to be able to do everyday. I hope you find something that makes you able to do art again like you used to I've never tried it out and I don't know if it will work for you but I wondering if doodling for a minute everyday could help? I'm thinking about trying that out ^_^ Also thank u! Is your pfp from danganropa btw?

 

[Caramelized]

awhhhh thank u so much for your reply (─‿‿─)♡ !!! Dude I relate to that first paragraph so much ;w; it really kept me sane when I was feeling at my most horrible. Hmmm I think what I like most about drawing is the escape from reality it gives me, also expressing emotions through art and hoping it will help other people that might feel similar to me

also I think that's a really good idea~ thank you so much (づ◡﹏◡)づ I think I tend to get too wrapped up in the numbers when I've posted my art before so I think that would be good to focus my attention off of that aspect, and like you said focus on what originally made me passionate about it :]

I'm sorry you've been feeling that way for so long :'< I bet your art is still amazing though ( ⸝⸝•ᴗ•⸝⸝ )੭⁾⁾ it's awful to have lost passion for something you used to be able to do everyday. I hope you find something that makes you able to do art again like you used to I've never tried it out and I don't know if it will work for you but I wondering if doodling for a minute everyday could help? I'm thinking about trying that out ^_^ Also thank u! Is your pfp from danganropa btw?

Yeah, it is!! ₍ ^. ̫ .^ ₎ I really enjoyed playing the games recently and I'm a sucker for the art style ♡

I think you're on to something with the daily doodles thing....I actually have been steadily increasing my drawing that way. Started off with little scribbles semi-daily, and by the end of the month, I was dying to draw full pieces again (✪_✪)

I feel you with the social media numbers game ┯ ㅅ ┯ It is so hard to not let it effect you. Drawings that you slave over never seem to get as much feedback as the drawing that you haphazardly cooked up while bored, you start to prioritize what you know will get you more likes and followers over what you really want to draw, and you're surrounded by all of these amazing artists who seem to have popped out of their mother's wombs painting the friggin' Mona Lisa....okay, I kind of went off lmao

TLDR: You're welcome and I get it ദ്ദി(៸៸T_T៸៸ )

 

[Malaria]

Same. I used to love drawing, but sadly depression and insecurity makes it difficult for me to draw now. I really want to get back into it, but the depression and insecurities overwhelm me. Sometimes I just start crying uncontrollably because I keep having an internal voice that tells me I'm an untalented hack that shouldn't even bother, and that I'm better off giving up on my passions and dying.

 

[druggedonsurvival]

As a musician I have felt the same way. I am an excellent composer but I have never been able to play my instruments as well as I want to and as a result I've never published anything I've written, even though there's some of it that I really like that if I could just get the motivation to practice enough, maybe I could record it and send it out there. But I'm so busy with my "real life" and I just don't have any time, which sucks because that's what I'm actually passionate about. For me it's also always been a way of expressing my emotions through art, and I've had times where I just couldn't do it because I felt so mediocre and that I'd never be good enough. I love sad music in particular because it makes me feel less alone - if I could do that for anybody with my music it would be truly amazing. But who knows with this constant back and forth between time, motivation and depression?

 

[tsumihoroboshi]

Feeling this way is terrible, I'm sorry :(
From the art I've seen in your posts, your style is super cute! It's always the worst when things that brought you joy no longer seem to do so. When I get like this with art, I just stop drawing for a little bit until real inspiration strikes and I'm back to the art grind. It happens in sporadically and then something gets triggered in my brain that's like "I NEED TO DRAW NOW!" and that dull and listless feeling goes away.

It helps to take a break from it for a bit bcus if you force yourself to draw when you don't feel like it, it becomes less fun and becomes something you're forced to do instead of enjoying it. A small little doodle here and there can help along the way too!

I hope you start feeling better in regards to it sooner than later!