My parents just killed me LMAO

[MakeUpAName4Me]

I chose Life. I was honest with my councilor and she told my mom to drive me to the psych ward asap. Yknow what happened tho? My mom was pretty annoyed and my dad was mad. In canada you wait a bajillion years to get called in at the hospital so 6 out of the probably 12 hours I had to wait passed in emerg and I read my dad's text to my mom talking about how I'm a fuckup HAHAHAHAHAH dude at that point I made up my final decision. My sn is coming soon and I've never felt more free and happy. I feel like a giddy lil kid right now…I love you guys

 

[makethepainstop]

I chose Life. I was honest with my councilor and she told my mom to drive me to the psych ward asap. Yknow what happened tho? My mom was pretty annoyed and my dad was mad. In canada you wait a bajillion years to get called in at the hospital so 6 out of the probably 12 hours I had to wait passed in emerg and I read my dad's text to my mom talking about how I'm a fuckup HAHAHAHAHAH dude at that point I made up my final decision. My sn is coming soon and I've never felt more free and happy. I feel like a giddy lil kid right now…I love you guys

Your not alone my friend, I am positively, rubbing my hands together, and cackling with glee, a the thought of my SN arriving next week. Much love to you.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I know I can only speak for myself, but since suicide is such a personal decision, and I believe whether to take my own life, or not to take my own life, is exclusively my own decision, and my right, I have to admit I cringe a bit when I hear that someone elses words influenced you in your decision to ctb. I just don't think anyone is so important enough to influence a decision of such magnitude that they should have a "vote" in whether I live or I die. Allowing that to happen usurps my rights. I want to go out on my own terms, for my reasons, influenced by no one. Maybe that's only me, though. But, your life is your life, obviously, and you need to make your own decisions.

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand why you would be so relieved at having the option of SN. None of us should have to feel trapped in this life with no way out. I wish you freedom.

 

[Hollowillow]

I chose Life. I was honest with my councilor and she told my mom to drive me to the psych ward asap. Yknow what happened tho? My mom was pretty annoyed and my dad was mad. In canada you wait a bajillion years to get called in at the hospital so 6 out of the probably 12 hours I had to wait passed in emerg and I read my dad's text to my mom talking about how I'm a fuckup HAHAHAHAHAH dude at that point I made up my final decision. My sn is coming soon and I've never felt more free and happy. I feel like a giddy lil kid right now…I love you guys

You're talking to us in the ward? Nice! It was hell for me there. They gave me agoraphobia by shaming me and that's it. I'm happy that you got sn.

I know I can only speak for myself, but since suicide is such a personal decision, and I believe whether to take my own life, or not to take my own life, is exclusively my own decision, and my right, I have to admit I cringe a bit when I hear that someone elses words influenced you in your decision to ctb. I just don't think anyone is so important enough to influence a decision of such magnitude that they should have a "vote" in whether I live or I die. Allowing that to happen usurps my rights. I want to go out on my own terms, for my reasons, influenced by no one. Maybe that's only me, though. But, your life is your life, obviously, and you need to make your own decisions.

If I do it all without help or influence, I'll have to hang myself instead of sn.

I wouldn't have been born without help. Ah curses!

 

[MidnightDream]

I'm so sorry. That's absolutely disgusting of your parents, you deserve so much better. Congrats on getting your SN, we're all here for you with whatever you decide to do next.

 

[Seiko]

I was in a psych ward. I told the counselors a lot of my pain was sourced from my father's chronic alcohol use. My dad visited me in the psych ward and said, "I'll never drink again." The first thing I heard when I got back home was him opening up a can. That was the moment I knew I'd do it someday.

 

[SarRy]

When parents devalue their kids it can seem like the message needed to tell them that they are worthless. If someone's parents don't want them, it can seem like a go ahead sign for suicide.

Alternatively, you can give up any notion that you have to help or be true to your parents. Leave them behind. Go move across the country. Go on a long holiday. Do whatever you like and don't worry.

At any rate, I hope you find your peace.

 

[freedompass]

I'd hope you wouldn't ctb to spite your parents. Your dad could've been talking from frustration in a private text to your mom, that doesn't make him a terrible person by definition. If you are young I'd suggest giving yourself time to experience independence at least.

 

[gomenasai]

I would just go away from your parents for GOOD if I were you. These are just WORDS and OPINIONS about you, not FACTS. In my humble opinion You need to toughen up and only consider suicide if that's really the end.

 

[eldiablo666]

I chose Life. I was honest with my councilor and she told my mom to drive me to the psych ward asap. Yknow what happened tho? My mom was pretty annoyed and my dad was mad. In canada you wait a bajillion years to get called in at the hospital so 6 out of the probably 12 hours I had to wait passed in emerg and I read my dad's text to my mom talking about how I'm a fuckup HAHAHAHAHAH dude at that point I made up my final decision. My sn is coming soon and I've never felt more free and happy. I feel like a giddy lil kid right now…I love you guys

Parents are incredibly evil.

It's a shame most people can't see it.

 

[madiroze]

I know I can only speak for myself, but since suicide is such a personal decision, and I believe whether to take my own life, or not to take my own life, is exclusively my own decision, and my right, I have to admit I cringe a bit when I hear that someone elses words influenced you in your decision to ctb. I just don't think anyone is so important enough to influence a decision of such magnitude that they should have a "vote" in whether I live or I die. Allowing that to happen usurps my rights. I want to go out on my own terms, for my reasons, influenced by no one. Maybe that's only me, though. But, your life is your life, obviously, and you need to make your own decisions.

I tried explaining this to my mother the other night after begging her to let me CTB - yes as a 38 year old woman with full self autonomy, I am not allowed to choose how to leave this planet and must instead, respect my mother's wishes to continue existing in the meaningless-ness and misery until she passes so she can be spared all the suffering she says she will feel upon my death. What about all my suffering NOW which I have endured since my mental breakdown over 21 years ago?? Is that somehow inferior and less painful than hers
??

If it wasn't for her constant guilt-tripping, I would happily CTB tomorrow. I have no emotional attachment to my life or my body. I believe I will cease to exist and return to my pre-birth state. This sounds perhaps cold but it is why CTB is not a big decision for me, it's a practical end to my mortal suffering. So headspace wise, I am ready to go ASAP but my mother has reign over my conscience and I resent her for this. One day the resentment will turn to hatred and then I will just carry out my plan inspite of her selfish regards for her own life above mine.

 

[asadghostgirl]

None of us chose to be born but we at least hope to be with people who care about us. That's always a crapshoot it seems. :( I like one of my parents but I would hate to have both of them insufferable like that, I'm sorry.

 

[Efilismislife]

I tried explaining this to my mother the other night after begging her to let me CTB - yes as a 38 year old woman with full self autonomy, I am not allowed to choose how to leave this planet and must instead, respect my mother's wishes to continue existing in the meaningless-ness and misery until she passes so she can be spared all the suffering she says she will feel upon my death. What about all my suffering NOW which I have endured since my mental breakdown over 21 years ago?? Is that somehow inferior and less painful than hers
??

If it wasn't for her constant guilt-tripping, I would happily CTB tomorrow. I have no emotional attachment to my life or my body. I believe I will cease to exist and return to my pre-birth state. This sounds perhaps cold but it is why CTB is not a big decision for me, it's a practical end to my mortal suffering. So headspace wise, I am ready to go ASAP but my mother has reign over my conscience and I resent her for this. One day the resentment will turn to hatred and then I will just carry out my plan inspite of her selfish regards for her own life above mine.

I dont understand tho

if she doesnt love you
she doesnt care if youre dead/ctb

Just like mine

im the opposite, i cant accept they sacrificed me and "push me down the cliff"
then i have to ctb after being disabled
cant accept that

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I tried explaining this to my mother the other night after begging her to let me CTB - yes as a 38 year old woman with full self autonomy, I am not allowed to choose how to leave this planet and must instead, respect my mother's wishes to continue existing in the meaningless-ness and misery until she passes so she can be spared all the suffering she says she will feel upon my death. What about all my suffering NOW which I have endured since my mental breakdown over 21 years ago?? Is that somehow inferior and less painful than hers
??

If it wasn't for her constant guilt-tripping, I would happily CTB tomorrow. I have no emotional attachment to my life or my body. I believe I will cease to exist and return to my pre-birth state. This sounds perhaps cold but it is why CTB is not a big decision for me, it's a practical end to my mortal suffering. So headspace wise, I am ready to go ASAP but my mother has reign over my conscience and I resent her for this. One day the resentment will turn to hatred and then I will just carry out my plan inspite of her selfish regards for her own life above mine.

I don't want to get into the dichotomy of the relationship between yourself and your mom, and I'm not making and judgement whether it's good or bad, right or wrong, but your mom cannot hold any control over you unless you grant that control to her.