My note

[Dizzylady80]

I wrote this note for my roommate/ best friend. I'm not gonna ctb today, still figuring things out, so they're not gonna see it yet. I'm really worried about them, they recently had a friend ctb and it was really hard on them, and considering how extremely close we are I know it's gonna be devastating. They are the best person I've ever met, and I really want them to be okay, but there's not a whole lot I can do about that other than make sure I do it where they won't be the one to find me. How does it look?

 

[Mellowmood]

Looks great.
but you have to know that there's nothing you could write to make people not feel bad about your death

 

[Dizzylady80]

Looks great.
but you have to know that there's nothing you could write to make people not feel bad about your death

Yeah I know. I've had friends ctb before, there's really no note or anything that would make it not feel just god awful. I just wanted to leave something for my roommate, not to make them be okay with it but just to leave something for them

 

[flower]

it's as lovely as a note can be I think

 

[megafire]

the only way i would improve it is by doodling something on it, maybe a flower or an animal - but thats just me. contentwise, its meaningful, but maybe elaborate on your friendship with the person and how much it meant to you?

 

[Dizzylady80]

the only way i would improve it is by doodling something on it, maybe a flower or an animal - but thats just me. contentwise, its meaningful, but maybe elaborate on your friendship with the person and how much it meant to you?

That's a good idea. I'm not much of an artist but I could try to draw something. My thinking was that they know for the most part how important they are to me, I mean we're super close, like in the past we talked about buying a house together eventually and traveling the world together, so I kinda figured they already know that I love them with my whole heart. But I'll think about maybe writing up a second one and comparing them. This is technically the first draft so I can always work on it

it's as lovely as a note can be I think

Thank you ❤ I'm pretty happy with it, just figured I'd get some feedback. Never made a note like this before so I don't really know what would be bad or good in something like this. The last thing I want to do is make things even harder for anyone by leaving a note that's gonna hurt them even more

 

[OminousVaL]

Nicely put.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

My thinking was that they know for the most part how important they are to me, I mean we're super close, like in the past we talked about buying a house together eventually and traveling the world together, so I kinda figured they already know that I love them with my whole heart.

That was a lovely first draft! From my editing experience, I think you could flesh each point out -- what is evidence of each point?

I think it would be a good idea to tell them what you love and appreciate about them and all they've done, what positive impacts they made on you and how, and that they themselves are enough, more than enough -- they have no ownership in your death and could not have prevented it, but directly contributed to the best in your life and made it worth trying even longer when you were ready to exit (only if that is true, of course).

 

[Time to fly]

Great note...I wish mine was as loving...sadly I have told the truth from my perspective to the one I love the most and it ended up in a lot of hatred and blame... thankfully not sent it and not CBT yet although tried but wasn't right time on Wednesday

 

[whywere]

Looks fine, BUT NOTHING anyone every writes is not going to make freinds, family..etc..feel sad and at a loss. I have been on here since 06.26.20, and I have made friends who have ctb. I feel the loss, it was their wish and I totally respect it, but still it was a loss to me. You@Dizzylady80, have in the short time you have been on here with us, commented on some of my responses and you feel like family now to me. So not only your friends, family where you are in the world, BUT I also think and feel for you. There in again, I TOTALLY respect everyones personal decisions, but it always hurts me to lose a global family member. I love, care and have all the empathy in the world to/for you. You are cared, loved and have all of the kindness in the world to you!!! Walter

 

[ecmnesia]

thanks for sharing such a personal thing. i was completely clueless on what to write, cause it didn't feel right to spill my frustrations and reasons to cbt on a goodbye letter. but seeing what you wrote... it gave a whole new perception of what the meaning of a cbt letter can be.

thank you so much for this. i was afraid of not finding a thing to say, but know I have an idea about what I want to leave for those I love.

 

[Dizzylady80]

Looks fine, BUT NOTHING anyone every writes is not going to make freinds, family..etc..feel sad and at a loss. I have been on here since 06.26.20, and I have made friends who have ctb. I feel the loss, it was their wish and I totally respect it, but still it was a loss to me. You@Dizzylady80, have in the short time you have been on here with us, commented on some of my responses and you feel like family now to me. So not only your friends, family where you are in the world, BUT I also think and feel for you. There in again, I TOTALLY respect everyones personal decisions, but it always hurts me to lose a global family member. I love, care and have all the empathy in the world to/for you. You are cared, loved and have all of the kindness in the world to you!!! Walter

Thank you Walter, that's very sweet. I've had friends ctb before, I know that there's not anything that I could do to ease the suffering of the people who care about me. It's just a little something I wanted to leave behind for my friend