suncide10
Student
- Apr 27, 2026
- 101
I'm so fucking tired of loneliness and want to talk to someone. But my life is so boring, I'm 21 and I've spent most of my life at home, I never had real friends that would actually want to hang out with me, when I was at school I usually was just dissociating most of the time. And my parents make it worse, dad is not interested in our family and mostly just exists, it's normal that we live in the same house and we don't talk with each other the whole day, and my mom has her own problems she has to do chores around the house and couldn't raise all by herself. I don't want to talk to both of them and I don't love them, I just have no feelings towards them like they're just strangers to me. I have probably the most boring life ever.
Sure I have or had some hobbies but I always stop doing them at some point, there's a ton of things I tried. I might say I actually like software engineering, I've been doing it for a few years, but because I was my fighting with my mind just to do basic things and burnt myself out Im stuck at a trainee level. If there was a project I actually liked and someone to support me, I would happily open my text editor and write some code again. I'm just so depressed I don't care about anything in life.
And there's nothing positive in my life I could tell people in real life so I prefer to say nothing because I don't wanna bring the mood down. I just want someone to ask me how I am doing, tell them how I actually feel and feel like they see me once in a while. I can't hold long conversations because I don't know why, maybe I just couldn't find the right person for me.
Sure I have or had some hobbies but I always stop doing them at some point, there's a ton of things I tried. I might say I actually like software engineering, I've been doing it for a few years, but because I was my fighting with my mind just to do basic things and burnt myself out Im stuck at a trainee level. If there was a project I actually liked and someone to support me, I would happily open my text editor and write some code again. I'm just so depressed I don't care about anything in life.
And there's nothing positive in my life I could tell people in real life so I prefer to say nothing because I don't wanna bring the mood down. I just want someone to ask me how I am doing, tell them how I actually feel and feel like they see me once in a while. I can't hold long conversations because I don't know why, maybe I just couldn't find the right person for me.
