Story my experience (badly planned, failed attempts)

[busybee]

As a teenager I attempted ctb 3 times. I wasn't online back then so I had no information. Despite the poorly thought through execution each time I wanted to share my experiences for those doing research.

1. Over the counter meds/painkiller OD
Took some of whatever I could find. It felt like my heart was fighting for its life because it was beating so hard and fast that I got scared. I had to fight the urge to go and make me throw up cause I got very nauseaus. Never vomited though (there appearently were meds against that in my mix). My head hurt a bit. A dull throbbing. I got tired eventually and fell asleep Woke up early feeling like I had a hangover.

2. Gas (from deodorant can)
>>Do not try and get high like that. Can have serious health effects up to (unpleasant) death<<
At some point I figured that the gas from deodorant cans makes you feel sorta high so my thought process was that if I substitute air with only gas I will just suffocate. It never hurt. The gas was warm and heavy in my lungs. Didn't feel right to breath it but not painful. My ears soon started to ring and I saw patterns. Started breathing in faster but never felt like suffocating. Just passed out and came to with a headache. My genius teen brain didn't calculate in that unconcious people breathe too. Breathing was odd for a bit till I got rid of all the gas and I had an odd taste back in my throat and mouth for a bit.

3. Cutting wrist
I used a sharp knive and cut my wrist. Failed cause I realised I didn't bleed enough and then I became terrifed of my parents seeing the wound and scar. It isn't as easy as it seems since it required some pressure to cut deep enough and it is hard not to give in and pull away. I got dizzy as heck. Turns out seeing blood makes me faint.

For me the most pleasant one was gas though my choice of what to use and how to use it were dumb.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds really awful what you've been through, failing ctb is exactly what I fear but at least you didn't end up with permanent damage.

 

[hunterfla]

I tried with OTC diet pills (uppers) when I was 13. Took a whole box and went to bed. Back then the diet meds contained Fen-Phen which is now banned, amid many deaths even from its recommended dosages. I woke my mom up in the middle of the night because my heart was beating out of my chest...of course she took me to the ER where my stomach was pumped. I'll never forget the doctor's words. "You're lucky...another hour or two and you wouldn't be here talking to me". Over 30 years later and it still haunts me that (according to him) I could've died and not had to endure all the misery of the last 3 decades.