lwlaiet8887
Embodiment of failure/Doom poster/Compassionate
- Sep 14, 2023
- 287
My H arrived today and this is the worst point of my life in terms of contentness. Lost all of the muscle I had on my frame so I look like a corpse at the moment, not to mention I haven't seen the sun in months so I'm sickly pale, it's going to be a harsh winter this year and I'm already getting chilled to the bone. I've lost pretty much all hope for life and am just trying to drink and smoke the days away, I don't enjoy anything anymore and there's nothing to look forward to. I feel ready to die more than ever. My life really does feel like a dream that went wrong, I never knew it could get this bad. I'm not sure if death is comforting or just relieving. I'm thinking of kicking around a bit longer so I can save some more money before I go. That way I'll be able to on a drug binge. I really want to try DMT and psychedelics one last time, I enjoyed them a lot and maybe they'll be able to help me make peace with my death. I just wish things could've gone better. I know I might come across as a POS at times but I feel that my suffering has gave me deep insight into the depths of the suffering the world, I feel for everyone. Suffering is not even evil it's just senseless and unending.
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