Z
zi99
Member
- Feb 23, 2020
- 95
Dear A., I'm writing it and hope that you're maybe reading it, I hope so. But knowing you, your honesty, your kind big heart, your courage I think you're not with us anymore. Sorry for being not the best friend, not understanding you enough, that you decided to do it. You asked me once do I want to commit suicide with you, but I said that I feel better and I thought that you also felt better, but if I knew that you were still suffering maybe I could help you more. I thought that we cannot meet because of our diseases and this distance between us always made everything harder, but we had truly something unordinary, for 7 months we talked with you every day for hours, none in my real life understood me as good as you did, you cared about me so much, about my state, my well-being. You were so strong, you have gone through bad things, you suffered much, it was hard for you to communicate with people, because of AVPD, but you talked with me. I feel so lonely without you, I would give you many things to see you just once. I didn't believe in our future, because I was depressed, but now I know that everything is possible until we are alive. Sorry for understanding it too late. I still hope that you will respond to my message and say that you're okay, but knowing how our diseases can be severe I think you could do it. Sorry for not supporting you enough and letting you go. You will be always in my heart ❤