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HelpMy boyfriend ..?
Thread startergirlwitharose
Start date
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My boyfriend started ghosting me. He reads my texts and let's my calls ring and answers with the automatic "I'll call you later" messages. I see him post on his snapchat stories and in his friends' stories too. He never invites me anywhere anymore. He never makes any plans. He never tries. What do i do??
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not-2-b-the-answer, Forever Sleep, Huntfish34 and 10 others
My boyfriend started ghosting me. He reads my texts and let's my calls ring and answers with the automatic "I'll call you later" messages. I see him post on his snapchat stories and in his friends' stories too. He never invites me anywhere anymore. He never makes any plans. He never tries. What do i do??
I'm so sorry you are going through this. I have experienced this type of thing too. It really is devastating. I don't mean to be intrusive, but does your boyfriend know how you really feel, as regards feeling down etc ?
If it was me I would just tell him that his ghosting behaviour is hurtful and take it from there. I hope things work out for the best for you.
I know you don't want to hear this but leave. Leave before it's too late. You aren't married, you aren't stuck. Right now you still have a way out.
If you stay you'll soon find yourself crying in bed next to him while he sleeps. If he ignores your cries for help now he'll also ignore you when you need him the most.
It started out like that with my husband. Now all I do is cry while he goes about his usual day. I would have never assumed he could be so cold but what you're describing now are the red flags I should have listened to.
No amount of joy or happiness when you're together is worth the pain he is causing you by deliberately going out and having fun while you're miserable and need him.
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Reactions:
not-2-b-the-answer, uniqueusername39, not_actually_human and 9 others
Sounds like that person isn't worth being around, certainly not somebody that should be trusted but I just think that in general you cannot trust humans.
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Reactions:
not-2-b-the-answer, psp3000, Fml and 2 others
My boyfriend started ghosting me. He reads my texts and let's my calls ring and answers with the automatic "I'll call you later" messages. I see him post on his snapchat stories and in his friends' stories too. He never invites me anywhere anymore. He never makes any plans. He never tries. What do i do??
Needed more info, so I checked out your previous posts
You have various possible actions. Some advocate breaking up. But I don't think that solves the root cause: your parents mentally mutilated you. Break up with him or not, this same problem may repeatedly occur. (Unless you luck out by getting a rare nurturing bf)
Your bf said he's attracted to his friend, who later unfriended him. Clearly, he has utter contempt/disrespect for you. There's others who deserve your affections more. Unfortunately, while you're still in contact with your abusive parents, it'll be hard to fix your problems
Reactions:
whatevs, not-2-b-the-answer, not_actually_human and 1 other person
I'm so sorry you are going through this. I have experienced this type of thing too. It really is devastating. I don't mean to be intrusive, but does your boyfriend know how you really feel, as regards feeling down etc ?
If it was me I would just tell him that his ghosting behaviour is hurtful and take it from there. I hope things work out for the best for you.
I know you don't want to hear this but leave. Leave before it's too late. You aren't married, you aren't stuck. Right now you still have a way out.
If you stay you'll soon find yourself crying in bed next to him while he sleeps. If he ignores your cries for help now he'll also ignore you when you need him the most.
It started out like that with my husband. Now all I do is cry while he goes about his usual day. I would have never assumed he could be so cold but what you're describing now are the red flags I should have listened to.
No amount of joy or happiness when you're together is worth the pain he is causing you by deliberately going out and having fun while you're miserable and need him.
I'm sorry you're going through that, It's now Tuesday and he's contacted me twice. I haven't answered him but i've read his texts. I'm thinking of breaking up. I'll try to be braver and end things while i can. Thank you
Reactions:
not-2-b-the-answer, ▪︎⚠ KOHI ⚠▪︎ and Worndown
Needed more info, so I checked out your previous posts
You have various possible actions. Some advocate breaking up. But I don't think that solves the root cause: your parents mentally mutilated you. Break up with him or not, this same problem may repeatedly occur. (Unless you luck out by getting a rare nurturing bf)
Your bf said he's attracted to his friend, who later unfriended him. Clearly, he has utter contempt/disrespect for you. There's others who deserve your affections more. Unfortunately, while you're still in contact with your abusive parents, it'll be hard to fix your problems
So you think my parents are the root of my problems? I mean, in all the relationships I have been in, they've all been manipulative, narcissistic men. Maybe I have a habit of going towards what my parents' "love" was.
My boyfriend started ghosting me. He reads my texts and let's my calls ring and answers with the automatic "I'll call you later" messages. I see him post on his snapchat stories and in his friends' stories too. He never invites me anywhere anymore. He never makes any plans. He never tries. What do i do??
My boyfriend started ghosting me. He reads my texts and let's my calls ring and answers with the automatic "I'll call you later" messages. I see him post on his snapchat stories and in his friends' stories too. He never invites me anywhere anymore. He never makes any plans. He never tries. What do i do??
Ghost him back and cut ties with him.
The relationships is messed up and over .
Never be taken for granted.
You are not anyone possession nor an object to be neglected ,abused nor gaslighted.
Reactions:
not-2-b-the-answer, girlwitharose, outrider567 and 1 other person
So you think my parents are the root of my problems? I mean, in all the relationships I have been in, they've all been manipulative, narcissistic men. Maybe I have a habit of going towards what my parents' "love" was.
Oh definitely. Your mom's been teeing off on you, using you as her stress punching bag. Your dad's been a ghost; I don't know what's up with him, but at best he's too much of a coward to protect you. Those in romantic/erotic relations with you fail utterly at the basics of caring for you
Maybe worst of all, everyone around you is an enabler, doing nothing to intervene. If you had minimally decent parents, you might not notice this. But your parents are bozos who don't deserve you. Total shitshow
Might help to have a grim sense of humor and see how ridiculous it is -- on all levels
Ghost him back and cut ties with him.
The relationships is messed up and over .
Never be taken for granted.
You are not anyone possession nor an object to be neglected ,abused nor gaslighted.
Good point. Could be practice in self-respect, especially if it's safe to break up with a little style. A step in asserting yourself as having a greater purpose than being some shithead's punching bag
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Reactions:
whatevs, not-2-b-the-answer and girlwitharose
My boyfriend started ghosting me. He reads my texts and let's my calls ring and answers with the automatic "I'll call you later" messages. I see him post on his snapchat stories and in his friends' stories too. He never invites me anywhere anymore. He never makes any plans. He never tries. What do i do??You
He acc made me feel happy in the beginning, he's told me before he'll hurt himself if i leave. I'm scared to do that but i know it's manipulative. Ugh i should really get over it
Oh definitely. Your mom's been teeing off on you, using you as her stress punching bag. Your dad's been a ghost; I don't know what's up with him, but at best he's too much of a coward to protect you. Those in romantic/erotic relations with you fail utterly at the basics of caring for you
Maybe worst of all, everyone around you is an enabler, doing nothing to intervene. If you had minimally decent parents, you might not notice this. But your parents are bozos who don't deserve you. Total shitshow
Might help to have a grim sense of humor and see how ridiculous it is -- on all levels
Good point. Could be practice in self-respect, especially if it's safe to break up with a little style. A step in asserting yourself as having a greater purpose than being some shithead's punching bag
This comment made me laugh, don't know why. Loved the way you put it though. I guess my parents neglective and abusive ways were the only things i knew and got attracted to. I should ghost him back, true. Be totally assertive .
One should not be forced to maintain a relationship to stop something terrible from happening. That is called being a hostage. If he hurts himself, that is really his problem. Stop making it yours!
My boyfriend started ghosting me. He reads my texts and let's my calls ring and answers with the automatic "I'll call you later" messages. I see him post on his snapchat stories and in his friends' stories too. He never invites me anywhere anymore. He never makes any plans. He never tries. What do i do??
My boyfriend started ghosting me. He reads my texts and let's my calls ring and answers with the automatic "I'll call you later" messages. I see him post on his snapchat stories and in his friends' stories too. He never invites me anywhere anymore. He never makes any plans. He never tries. What do i do??
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