Help my boyfriend knows I use this site, what should I do?

[rammi77]

just basically what the title suggests. I didn't know he knew about these kinds of forums, I was using the site when he peeks over my shoulder, and he saw it. I laugh it off not thinking much and he starts talking about how he understands why sites like these exists. we didn't say much more. i think he knows my intention??? should i do something??? he might stop me from attempting

 

[CW36]

No, don't do anything. Wait for him to make the first move. If he's curious or concerned, he'll speak out soon enough.

 

[gov]

just basically what the title suggests. I didn't know he knew about these kinds of forums, I was using the site when he peeks over my shoulder, and he saw it. I laugh it off not thinking much and he starts talking about how he understands why sites like these exists. we didn't say much more. i think he knows my intention??? should i do something??? he might stop me from attempting

Give him a big hug and tell him you love him

 

[AnonGermany]

Being on this Forum doesnt automatically mean that this person is gonna harm themselves. You could be just curious, wanted to know how to help a friend that was in a dark place in their mind, read about experiences others made in therapy. This place is a good place to do that anonymously.

You could Start talking to him about it, how does he know about this? Maybe he experienced something similar once, or a friend of his.

The topics and thoughts/experiences shared here are usually not something you share with close people, due to fears of rejection, being called crazy... dramatic... etc..

Small steps, slowly approach it. Dont reveal anything that you are not ok with.

 

[koitenchi]

Off topic, I appreciate the mayura picture

I think, my bf knows as well; I am unsure of how he feels about it, maybe skeptical; I try not to worry about it, unless it is brought up

 

[whywere]

If it was me, the very 1st thing that I would do is sit down, close my eyes, a few very deep breaths and think. As far as" do I see myself with this person for the long haul? Waking up and seeing this person across the breakfast table and taking a walk at night hand in hand? If one would say yes, then, in my opinion, I would have a coffee, tea or soda, NO alcohol, weed or street drugs at this juncture with the person and bring it up. A lasting AND loving relationship is all about trust, honesty, and being best friends. Not being risqué' at all, but does this person make one feel alive and wonderful? Then an open, loving and honest talk would be in order.

Case in point, I found out when the bank called me and told me that the checking account was almost wiped clean. Would the marriage be saved? Maybe /maybe not, but not tell one's life partner nothing and trying to keep them in the shadows, NEVER EVER works, long time down the road, and I feel too many people do not think long term, just in the moment.

Also, just because one is on here, there in again, does NOT mean that a person is 100% looking at ctb or the like. Like me, I find this site so supportive and like family to/for me, read supportive. Now the other person should not take offense, as far as "hey am I not being supportive enough to/for you?" kind of a question. The other person more than likely is doing a great service. help, BUT there is nothing like being, talking, thinking and reacting to folks who have some of the same issues that the person has.

When I applied to this site, I was 100% honest in so far as with 2 attempts I wanted to be around folks who could understand my plight and I could do the same for them. I NEVER said anything about ctb.

Just relax, talk it over/through and one might find out that there has been an unspoken understanding all along.

Walter

 

[Dead Already]

Agree with Walter, if you have feelings for this man, a sober conversation would be the best thing.
Less stress on you for hiding something, maybe he can help you through what is hurting you.

If you love him and he loves you it will all work out fine.

And most important, breathe

 

[Holu]

Ngl, I was just thinking about what would happen if two people dating found eachother on here. It's surprisingly wholesome, even if it means something else entirely. I wish I could offer solid advice, but in truth idrk what to say. In the end the decision is yours, and yours alone, and you don't owe it to anyone to stay alive. If and when you need peace, you will find it, I promise.

And hey, maybes it possible this is a small turn around point. At the very least it means he understands you a lot better than you might think. Take whatever solace and comfort you can in this cruel cold world

 

[SolomonKado]

just basically what the title suggests. I didn't know he knew about these kinds of forums, I was using the site when he peeks over my shoulder, and he saw it. I laugh it off not thinking much and he starts talking about how he understands why sites like these exists. we didn't say much more. i think he knows my intention??? should i do something??? he might stop me from attempting

The problem I've had for a long time is not everyone can share their feelings. Some just bottle them up until there is a reaction no one wants. I hope he isn't like that. It's difficult to be around or with people who are like that.

If you feel you need to then do so, but if you are truly not worried about it then the rest is on him. I don't know if you two have been together that long or not, but you probably know him best.

I won't ask his feelings on the whole matter because it's not my relationship. Just do what you feel is right. Good luck either way

 

[Yakamoz]

Even if he didn't know, you should have broken up with him. If you are suicidal you are not fit to be in a relationship. Show some empathy.

 

[rammi77]

Even if he didn't know, you should have broken up with him. If you are suicidal you are not fit to be in a relationship. Show some empathy.

Well, he was beside me when I read this, initially I was flustered even though I am not a suicidal person, but he told me it's not wrong to be together especially since he uses the site too. Thank you for your comment anyways

 

[Yakamoz]

Well, he was beside me when I read this, initially I was flustered even though I am not a suicidal person, but he told me it's not wrong to be together especially since he uses the site too. Thank you for your comment anyways

thank you ofc it is normal then if you are both suicidal