heroingirl
heroin girl by boy fantasy
- Oct 31, 2025
- 12
i've struggled with eating disorders for the past 8 years. found out i could just puke at will and started doing it without even knowing about eating disorders at all and why it was bad. i thought i found a secret cheat code. started seeing side effects and attempted to stop purging but i just transitioned into ednos where id binge and restrict while also having constant relapses. gained a bunch of weight so went back to bulimia. destroyed myself even more and landed back on ednos.
sucks too because i have a drinking problem now and am at the point where i pass my maintenance calories every day just with alcohol alone, but i still have to eat sometimes. so now im just fat. cant give up alcohol because its the only thing that will let me feel emotions anymore with my meds. can't stop my meds or i'll lose my job.
i'm so sick of being in this constant loop of self hatred and just barely getting by. i can never get what i want and i have to fight myself tooth and nail to get anything even mediocre. i just wish there was an easier way to exist
sucks too because i have a drinking problem now and am at the point where i pass my maintenance calories every day just with alcohol alone, but i still have to eat sometimes. so now im just fat. cant give up alcohol because its the only thing that will let me feel emotions anymore with my meds. can't stop my meds or i'll lose my job.
i'm so sick of being in this constant loop of self hatred and just barely getting by. i can never get what i want and i have to fight myself tooth and nail to get anything even mediocre. i just wish there was an easier way to exist
