My apologies

[checkouttime]

So some of you may have seen a few of my post yesterday and i wanted to apologise, i was having a bad day. I'm sure the genuine members out there will know what that is!! Although i don't want to make excuses and blame things on illness i have etc, like some people do. At the end of the day I'm responsible for my actions (just like i'm responsible for choosing to be on this site) and i hold my hands up.

A group of pro lifers did attack me, i say pro lifers as these people were ok with another member openly mocking me for being suicidal. Now i know all the genuine members of the site would never think that is ok wheres these people report me for my mocking what a person said, but didn't bother reporting the person who was mocking me for being suicidal. there is a difference in mocking what a person says, to mocking a person on a suicide site for being ACTUAL suicidal. I'm sure most members on here can understand that.

One of this group has tried to 'dox' me. they were continuously asking personal question privately, and when i didn't give them that information they called me 'reserved' as i would n't give them the information they were looking for..They then proceeded to say how they were uneasy with tall the young people on the site. As genuine members i know you'll understand the there are no young members on this site, only ADULTS. Who have the right to choose what they do with THEIR lives and not have others spread misinformation and scaremonger them, causing even more suffering and pain, which they have already had plenty of in their lives. they actually then asked me to be their friend LMAO,which i totally ignored of course.Their like that obsessed GF that just won't let go lol. You might think they would have grave to visit or something more important to do, then again they were never arsed about their friends/relatives when they were alive, so i don't expect them to change now. there more interested in harassing suicidal strangers.

Thankfully another LONG TERM GENUINE MEMBER, stepped in an advised me to ignore them(I won't name them as i don't want them to attack the aswell). I don't talk to this person all the time and we don't like each others posts constantly. They are just a genuine member who could see i was having a bad day(they can obviously relate, being a genuine suicidal person), and i thank the m for their advice. I'll openly admit i don't usually listen to others, but i knew they had my best interests at heart, they have been here a longtime and are genuine and don't post constant negative comments all the time questioning methods etc. so i listened to their good advice. You will see these groups of people, they like each others post constantly, they make negative comments about all the methods. I'm sure you will be able to see the attar's emerging, and if you didn't well now you know what to look out for.

I must admit i didn't find it helpful being mocked for being a GENUINE SUICIDAL person. I have N and i must admit i thought about just drinking it. But then Why let the pro lifers win and be another one of their statistics. If your a new member i will give you a little information about these types. they have previous for making members here CTB(even though they claim to be trying to 'save' people). They 'doxxed' a member called mahaakaliSS_MahaDurga , that was by a member who had multiple accounts, pertended to be different genders and suffer from different illnesses. they were a guy and pretended to be a young autistic girl(how fucked up is that) this person had joined one of the groups against this site and others like it Fixthe26 . Then there was a 2nd member called Rue89 who was again 'doxxed' her crime, talking to a pro-lifers relative(last time i looked it wasn't a crime to talk to people and it also show you how reliable the methods are ,the pro-lifers friends/relatives have all used them successfully) this person sadly took there own life due to the constant attacks fro these people, they posted all over their groups about this person. when the member was in the process of CTB they posted on here about being scare. the reaction from these people was to post how they hoped they were suffering, again another case of mocking asuicidal person. andi guess you can see the pattern emerging here. All the proof of the things i mention are in various threads around the site, so it can obviously be checked if anyone is interested in reading about these types in more detail. i have posted one thread below

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...-our-former-members.67486/page-2#post-1246322

In regards to the 1st member that was here, i have been here a while now and was one of the 1st people to point out that Bipolarguy was a fake person who didn't have any interest in helping people on here,.SO i do have EXPERIENCE in weeding out these pro life types. these people just want to be famous on their facebook groups etc, and use suicidal people to get their 5 minutes of fame and look good to their friends. when in reality they are far more dark and dangerous, more so than any genuine members on here as none of us encourage other, wheres these people do. while also being under the disguise of wanting to 'help'. People should be left alone to read the information and decide by themselves what they want, were all ADULTS who can make decisions, regardless off these people want to make us think we are crazy and can't use our own brains. These people look at us as if we are babies, when we are not, we are all UNIQUE individuals, who all have different illness/circumstances.

Anyway these people focussing on demeans they aren't focussing on you genuine members, who may be more susceptible to hurt from these people and i'm more than willing let that happen. Stay safe people and watch out for the types i have mentioned, we all need to stick together and keep a watchful eye out for each other.

 

[Weary Soul]

Of all that you wrote above, a number of things jumped out at me. The most important to me was this:

"Stay safe people and watch out for the types i have mentioned, we all need to stick together and keep a watchful eye out for each other."

This!

I agree that it is very important to stay safe and that we look out for one another. Especially given what I have seen happen here and in real life over my ermm..... *coughs a bit and mutters under my breath* .... way too many years on this earth. : )

One of the difficult things about this site (or any site for that matter), is that those who come here do so from so very many different walks of life - be it mental/physiological diseases and/or trauma of a wide range of severities, ages, cultures, etc. And these factors alone can lead to a misunderstanding when reading scribbles on a page (ie., what is written here). Because this is a written forum, we may lose the subtle nuances of non-verbal clues that give a wealth of information that is lost on a 2-d page.

I too saw some "yellow flags," I won't go into what I saw as this is over. Also, I tend to be pretty cautious about accusing anyone of anything as I have been on the receiving end of this far too many times in my life without cause and it feels terrible. That being said, while I try not to outright accuse anyone of anything, if I suspect something is off, I absolutely will watch for patterns in writing and content of writing - both in a single post as well as posts over time - this will tell a story.

Based on what you wrote above, I cannot imagine how triggering it was for someone to say, "No wonder you are suicidal." And this statement absolutely threw me into shock when I read it - that kind of statement - no matter how attacked one may feel - is utterly and completely unacceptable ANYWHERE let alone among vulnerable people posting here. I would never ever say something like this to someone in real life let alone to someone on a suicide forum. Still a bit shocked at that one frankly.

Although many may disagree with me, sometimes, people who scream and rage the hardest/loudest are the ones that really need to be heard/listened to the most. I am not saying how you went about dealing with what you saw was the best way to handle it, but it seemed to me you were really in distress. I would add, just as an aside, writing what you did (not all of it, but some of it) has the potential to harm your case/cause rather than have people listen - and can really harm the recipient if you are mistaken.

My suggestion, for what is it worth?

If in the future you feel upset or worried that someone is a predator here, step back, try to stay calm, and outline (with calm, ice cold logic - not emotion), what you found to be a yellow/red flag for you, and then post it with questions (not accusations) to the op (this gives the op a chance to respond and also gives others a chance to weigh in from their perspective) - and at the same time, report your concerns to the mods. I am pretty sure they have access to a lot more tools and ways to verify/look into your concerns than most of us do.

While I may not agree with how you did it, I do appreciate you looking out for everyone. Thank you for that. : )

No one is perfect and mud was slung on both sides. And since the heat index is well over 105 F (+41 C) where I am - I am getting the water hose out and spraying everyone down. Balloon fight everyone - joking, except for how hot it is here. And I apologize if this seemed irrelevant (just my lame attempt to try and cool things down a bit for all of us). <3

Peace to all, and, checkouttime, I hope you are having a better day today.

: )

 

[checkouttime]

I know people come here from different walks of life etc. thats why i think sometimes they might not notice certain things, it can then be helpful to post about certain stuff that way they can be aware of things to look out for. although i don't think genuine members are as stupid as is made out, members were able to find this site and going off their own back. so i'm sure they can read stuff and see the points being made.

i still hold the opinion that a group of members proceeded to report me for things i said, but weren't in the slightest bit bothered about a person mocking another for being ACTUAL suicidal. Any genuine people would be also reporting that, mores than anything else so IMO. that actually screams volumes to me, these type of people have a history of picking and choosing what they can and can't be bothered with, everyone knows that. I leave it to other members to make judgment on that, i'm just making them aware of the fact.

like i said i have apologised and am not going to use being ill as an excuse.

I just want members to have the right information and not be scaremonger etc. members here have suffered enough without the need fo more anxiety and pain. thats why we come here to get away from other people who don't understand or know what it feels like. what people then choose to do with the information is upto them, its a choice only they can make, no1 encourages here. well i say that, there's proof of pro-lifers doing it, even if in some case it could be seen as in directly.

Anyway like i said i apologise.

lol i can see why the hose pipe might be needed in that type of heat!!!

 

[Ramirez]

i don't want to make excuses and blame things on illness i have etc, like some people do.

Ppl who are mentally Ill are just using excuses for their action? . Who does? Oh you were talking about yourself. U used "People" instead of "I".

 

[Life_and_Death]

Ppl who are mentally Ill are just using excuses for their action? . Who does? Oh you were talking about yourself. U used "People" instead of "I".

actually i was just questioning myself yesterday where i said "yes my self destruction is my disorders but how far does that line get pushed before its just an excuse".

i found it difficult to find an answer coming to the conclusion that there isnt really one because i wouldnt be doing it at all if not for my disorders.

 

[Weary Soul]

You wrote above: "i still hold the opinion that a group of members proceeded to report me for things i said, but weren't in the slightest bit bothered about a person mocking another for being ACTUAL suicidal"

Personally, and it may just be me, mocking someone for being suicidal has no place anywhere and especially here, given the depths of hell that leads someone to a decision like this. Although I did not say it, I am sorry it was said to you.

Sometimes reporting goes on behind the sceens.

I presonally did not report anything yesterday and I didn't report it, because I figured the mods were getting innudated with reports and did not need more reports cluttering up their "inboxes."

I also figured that the mods were on top of it (or soon would be) given all that was going on and would address the many issues there - including your concerns (and sometimes this does not happen right away - it may take the mods a bit of time to review everything). I think I saw this happen with little amy.

: )

@Ramirez, where did checkout time say mental illness? Your quoted text indicates he said illness. Did I miss something?

 

[checkouttime]

You wrote above: "i still hold the opinion that a group of members proceeded to report me for things i said, but weren't in the slightest bit bothered about a person mocking another for being ACTUAL suicidal"

Personally, and it may just be me, mocking someone for being suicidal has no place anywhere and especially here, given the depths of hell that leads someone to a decision like this. Although I did not say it, I am sorry it was said to you.

Sometimes reporting goes on behind the sceens.

I presonally did not report anything yesterday and I didn't report it, because I figured the mods were getting innudated with reports and did not need more reports cluttering up their "inboxes."

I also figured that the mods were on top of it (or soon would be) given all that was going on and would address the many issues there - including your concerns (and sometimes this does not happen right away - it may take the mods a bit of time to review everything). I think I saw this happen with little amy.

: )

@Ramirez, where did checkout time say mental illness? Your quoted text indicates he said illness. Did I miss something?

I'm not saying people have to report stuff, i didn't report it myself and it was aimed at me!!!! I'm just saying people were openly complain about my posts and saying they reported what i had wrote but had no interest in the post made against me. I think it kinda shines a light on how its ok for one, but not another sort of attitude. the same rules apply to everyone, so if i was going to report a person for one thing, i would then also do it about another. maybe thats just me being a genuine member though and not having a rule for sum and not others.

Oh i knew i would get reported, i knew what i was doing, i'm not hiding that fact at all.

Ppl who are mentally Ill are just using excuses for their action? . Who does? Oh you were talking about yourself. U used "People" instead of "I".

@Ramirez, where did checkout time say mental illness? Your quoted text indicates he said illness. Did I miss something?

Please take your time reading my comments and what i said properly, i never once said what you mentioned. It doesn't help making false accusations up, especially when its written in black and white for everyone to see, the PROOF is in the post I always like to back what i say with ACTUAL evidence personally

 

[Weary Soul]

Yes, the same rules apply to everyone - double standards suck don't they? Trust the mods or maybe PM one to speak with them about your concerns. I did see a few other things in that thread that made me pause.

And I will state the one that sticks out in mind, outright, here so that there is no confusion.

I cannot find the user ID right now (my apologies); however, this person called out for your immediate bannishment, demanded immediate actions from the mods, and also attempted to shame-blame people here for watching the thread and not reporting you. In my view, that latter one was the worst of them. Shame-blaming tactics to me are another form of bullying - an attempt to coerce people to follow what they believe through negatively manipulating a negative emotional response or feeling in the recipient. There are mods here for a reason - so I would say to that same person what I said to you - state your piece, contact the mods and let them handle it. Course that is my opinion only.

In the interests of those in the community, I am going to stop here, this discussion has been going on for awhile now, and may be upsetting to some (some who are more vulnerable to disagreements, drama... things like that).

I do understand checkouttime. Like you said, some people here may be vulnerable, traumatized, etc., but that does not make them stupid. Even incredibly intelligent people can get get caught up or triggered with what appears on the surface to be outrageous comments without understanding the undercurrents. I would reiterate my thoughts on using ice-cold logic and questions rather than attempts to trigger a response.

Edited: I edited a sentence for clarity - the changes are shown in strikeout and italics above.

 

[checkouttime]

might i adds that in making the comment

i don't want to make excuses and blame things on illness i have etc, like some people do."

at no point did i say that there was something wrong with people doing that, i just mentioned it happens. I was pointing out that me personally wasn't going to use that as my reason.

Don't worry i can figure out the person your talking about, it will be exactly the same person who was asking me personal information etc, and thought i was stupid enough to give it them. I actually spun them a web of bullshit for their troubles, which i know they will have believed as they thought i trusted them because, i was replying and talking to them. Two can play at their game!!

I take heart from the fact people didn't follow suit of the member trying to coerce others to report me. I take that as people could see what ws going on, I'm not saying they agreed with what i was doing. but they obviously saw something to not act. It sounds similar the threads where groups of them get together and post negative comments about methods etc and like each others comments, its always the same people and i know the genuine members will see it aswell



Yes the MODS are here for a reason you are right, and they haven't banned me. I was warned i will admit that, but i pretty much expected that.

exactly!!!!! people on here suffer from issues/illness but stupid they are NOT. i have always made that point, unfortunately sum people think this isn't the case. And any person that could be vulnerable and prone to attacks off these people,I would like to help as much as i can, by pointing out things that aren't correct/misleading/lies etc. they are the people that it bothers me most about, the ones that these users prey on, its WRONG.

thank you for your input and thanks alot for sharing the information on what you have personally seen. its very much appreciated