Venting Misery Loves Company. TW: Substance Abuse

[grimmtheripper]

The anniversary of my best friend's suicide is in 10 days. I keep having weird flashbacks to snorting heroin in the bathroom during his service. I don't really remember the "after party" we all threw as his friends, I was on so much xanax, so much alcohol, I was so messed up. That was the beginning of the end for me.. That night. I hate that when he was at his lowest point, I was also at mine. I wasn't in the place to help him the way he needed. We suffered in different ways, but my misery loved his company. I dunno, I just. Overdosing always seemed like the best way to go and I've tried so many times and I just can't get it right. I know it's selfish, but I wish he was here. I should have been there. Even if I couldn't have saved him that night, I could have at least made sure he didn't die alone.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry that you lost someone. It must be hard dealing with that but at least those who are gone cannot suffer anymore. Rest in peace.

 

[keitaro]

so sad to lose a friend that way. sounds like you miss him a lot.