Kokonoe
Worthless, Broken Doll
- Apr 20, 2023
- 70
not like officially diagnosed with it or anything yet but it's been suggested by my therapist and my psychiatrist that i probably have it and should consider it and am showing behaviors of it. and this was brought up twice within the first week of starting the IOP. and they did like a fucking screening for it (without telling me what it was for ofc) and i legit said yes/agreed to every question they asked me. i'm so fucking cooked.
i have only really had horrible experiences with people with BPD and have been treated so fucking badly (read: abused) by people with it that i'm so upset at the thought of having it myself. i don't want to fuckin be like them at all. that's so upsetting. and it's just *another* thing to deal with and i'm sick of it. i'm already so ill. i already have too much i have to deal with every day of my life. i don't want even more. why does it always just get worse. fuck my stupid dollgirl life man.
i have only really had horrible experiences with people with BPD and have been treated so fucking badly (read: abused) by people with it that i'm so upset at the thought of having it myself. i don't want to fuckin be like them at all. that's so upsetting. and it's just *another* thing to deal with and i'm sick of it. i'm already so ill. i already have too much i have to deal with every day of my life. i don't want even more. why does it always just get worse. fuck my stupid dollgirl life man.
