Met a creepy person here but was able to escape

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

I won't name the individual (I really wish I could) but I'll use my experience as a warning on what to be wary of

So I have BPD. Borderline Personality Disorder. Two weeks ago I was having a suicidal melt down. I was crying, wanted to run from home, and wanted to die. In that moment a user here reached out to me. He acted so sweet in wanting to help me. The first sign somethign was off was how quickly he opened up. He gave me his number and discord account. I should have trusted my gut but something about him was so attractive. How he talked to me and picked at my inner desires and sexual preferences. I knew it was wrong but, I also wanted him. So ignored my gut I went with it. Things only got worse

We went from sweet talk to sexting to talking about meeting one day. In it he repeatedly said I am free to leave, but I never did. I wanted him and felt I needed him and he knew that and picked at it constantly

The part that made me consider leaving all together was when he (a white person) talked to me ( a black person) using the n word. Three times, twice with the hard r. I was so offended, yet it was my fault for not being understanding. It was my fault for not being direct. And then after a teary break up which he initiated, I decided to accept it. Told him I was moving on and left it at that. I blocked him everywhere, except SS initially. He messaged me here with some chilling words " im all for giving you space but i told you i never had any intentions of leaving you or letting you go so easily."

I was so scared I decided to report him and ignore him. Though my report was not taken seriously, it made me realize that I really dodged a bullet

What I will say is to just be careful when a person reaches out to you. There are good people in the world but many want to prey on those who struggle with trust and are insecure and use that to their advantage. I will know next tume to be careful, though this was an experience I wont forget.

I just had to get all this off my chest. Thank you for listening.

 

[Deleted member 23374]

Please alert the Mods ?

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

Please alert the Mods ?

I reached put to one but did not hear back. are there other mods who take issues like this seriously?

 

[AutoTap]

99.9% of the time people trying to meet on a forum dedicated to mental health issues, health issues, ctb, etc is a HUGE RED FLAG. Please don't do it! Stay safe!

im glad your okay

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

"im all for giving you space but i told you i never had any intentions of leaving you or letting you go so easily."

Just for clarity, did you report that particular message?

 

[Deleted member 23374]

I'm sure all the Mods will take this seriously. It is late though, with the battle on it wouldn't suprise me as to some delay.
Just @ the mods direct in your post.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

Just for clarity, did you report that particular message?

I did. I messaged the whole thread
Is there a list with the names of some mods? I am very worried about an individual like this hanging around this site

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I did. I messaged the whole thread
Is there a list with the names of some mods? I am very worried about an individual like this hanging around this site

Thanks for replying.

Are you comfortable to say how the mod(s) responded?

 

[Deleted member 23374]

I did. I messaged the whole thread
Is there a list with the names of some mods? I am very worried about an individual like this hanging around this site

@Marquis
@RainAndSadness
@BPD Barbie
@_Minsk

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

I got a message saying nah they looked into it but not much could be done. to just report anything I find creepy

 

[M]

I got a message saying nah they looked into it but not much could be done. to just report anything I find creepy

Can you send me a PM with information?

I'll look into this myself.

Thanks!

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

Unfortunately I only have an email with the conversation itself. Since I left the convo out of fear I dont have it stored here on SS on my end

 

[M]

Unfortunately I only have an email with the conversation itself. Since I left the convo out of fear I dont have it stored here on SS on my end

That's fine.

You can send me a screenshot of that.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

Ok
I had sent the screenshots just now. I dont know how much weight they will hold but I figure I would try anyways

 

[RainAndSadness]

I'm sorry that happened to you. I hope you're doing better now. Always feel free to report such incidents to me. I take these very seriously. Thanks in advance.

 

[hoping to lose hope]

Hi Op I am also bpd person so I totally understand how in hindsight all the redflags can be ignored and although we must have some personal responsibility we should not have to put up with malicious people at all.
Always be weary of others especially if they talk about sexual things which to me is a huge red flag regardless of who I interact with.
Try to stay safe and the mods from my understanding do try to do their best.

 

[Soul]

@DeathIsTheWayOut99, I'm sorry you had this experience. I don't understand why you feel you can't tell us the person's screen name; they'll just keep doing it to people if they're left unnamed.

Is @Hasssssuùuu no longer a mod?

 

[Emily_Numb]

Just block and move on. No need to make multiple threads about it.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

@DeathIsTheWayOut99, I'm sorry you had this experience. I don't understand why you feel you can't tell us the person's screen name; they'll just keep doing it to people if they're left unnamed.

Is @Hasssssuùuu no longer a mod?

I mean I feel if I did that I would get in trouble. Are people allowed to do such a thing?

 

[Deleted member 23374]

I mean I feel if I did that I would get in trouble. Are people allowed to do such a thing?

A straight up outing would probably be poor form, i don't see any issue with pm'ing the username to those who are concerned. Be pro active in your defense.

 

[DeathIsTheWayOut99]

A straight up outing would probably be poor form, i don't see any issue with pm'ing the username to those who are concerned. Be pro active in your defense.

Yeah thats what I figured. I already mentioned the name of the user to two mods so far personally.

 

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

When I read the title, I assumed that the OP met this guy in person and he held her captive or something.

Glad you managed to "escape" this abusive and highly dangerous situation by putting him on ignore and reporting him to the mods.

 

[grungeCat]

I'm sorry it happenned to you. Racism is something I hate the most. You have to be careful here as there are some bad people trying to feed upon the weak.

 

[Symbiote]

Nothing worse than a "white knight" coming in here to save vulnerable souls from eternal damnation, but there's always a price...sad reality these days.

 

[Sinkinshyp]

I'm so sorry that you had to be treated that way. Please be careful while some here are genuine with good intent there are wolves in sheeps clothing all around us.

 

[OminousVaL]

Hello I am the aforementioned "creepy person" and I am willing to answer any questions people may have about my side of the story. I would like to say that there was not much of an escape it was more like she wanted to be with me and once I told her that I do not think a relationship could work between us (we never where dating) she blocked me everywhere and removed me. The quote is true and I can see how it was interpreted the way that it was so despite no malicious intent that is my fault. From my perspective she opened up to me first. I messaged her here because I thought maybe we could resolve things and continue to be friends and as far as the N word goes it was a mistake on my part but I never used it against her and the moment she told me to stop using it I quit all together and we talked about the scenario over and over with me apologizing up to 3 times for it.

 

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

Hello I am the aforementioned "creepy person" and I am willing to answer any questions people may have about my side of the story. I would like to say that there was not much of an escape it was more like she wanted to be with me and once I told her that I do not think a relationship could work between us (we never where dating) she blocked me everywhere and removed me. The quote is true and I can see how it was interpreted the way that it was so despite no malicious intent that is my fault. From my perspective she opened up to me first. I messaged her here because I thought maybe we could resolve things and continue to be friends and as far as the N word goes it was a mistake on my part but I never used it against her and the moment she told me to stop using it I quit all together and we talked about the scenario over and over with me apologizing up to 3 times for it.

Why did you use the n word in the first place, in what context?

 

[Symbiote]

There is no need to even say any racial slur in front of anyone. Shouldn't even be in the back of your mind at all unless you're a racist douchebag.

 

[OminousVaL]

Why did you use the n word in the first place, in what context?

The first time I was just having fun and used it with an A casually and she told me that she wanted me to say it again and so I proceeded to repeat it twice more before she eventually started becoming very upset at my usage of the word and I apologized and she would not let it go for days and my mistake became the main focus of conversation with me needing to constantly reassure her that I was not racist or she would leave me.

 

[nerve]

Sometimes I feel really grateful that I'm too awkward and bumbling to actually make friends or speak to people here.