I've had OCD since I was in elementary school. The only thing that helped was ADHD meds. according to my psych nurse, OCD and ADHD can go together. And the only thing that helps for OCD is the ADHD meds. Not the antidepressants. I wish I could've seen her years ago, but through out all those years she didn't live where I live yet and every other doctor I saw didn't have the level of experience that she had so they kept giving me the wrong meds. it sucks. I also have depression, and I'm thinking about trying a different anti depressant to see if it will help. you could possibly get genetic testing to see which meds will help if your interested. some insurances will pay for it. and may be helpful for you. i know meds can be difficult and suck, but I know several people in my own life that take antidepressants and it really helped them with the depression/anxiety/suicidal thoughts. They just had to try a few different ones until they found the right med.