Venting Love & Loss

[LucifersIntrovert]

I've had this friend group of mine since middle school and now into college (around 7-8 years now) and we've been best friends through thick and thin. Just the 4 of us against the world. It was priceless what we had going on. But of course not all good things stay good forever. Starting about 2 months ago one of our friends (let's call him D) got into his 5-6th relationship and we were happy for him as always and supporting him on his decisions. But then he slowly turned it went from talking everyday about guitars, bands, music, games, family, goals, hopes, dreams, etc… you get the point. To talking once a week then once every 2 weeks. And the only thing we would talk about was her. So I went to his house to spend the night. As soon as I got there he hits me with the "Bro I need to talk to you about her" that whole day was about her and she wasn't even there. It was just "She gives amazing head", "She is so tight bro". It was disgusting but it just broke my heart seeing him slowly leave us. But then after all that talking about her in the day HE FACETIMED HER FROM 10-6AM, granted we didn't do anything at night because all he was doing was talking about her and to her it still just hurt. Then talking to his brother that's how he's always been he's more distant from his family, doesn't talk about anything but her. And he's just basically her biggest fan (which is good but he's cut ties with us and his family) because "we don't talk to him anymore" HE NEVER TRIED TO TALK TO US. But the little cherry on top is when I went over last Friday for one last chance to give him. He did good no talking about her for the day but the night came and ohh the night. He FaceTimed From 10pm-the next day at 2:00 pm craziest thing I've ever seen, but then I told him what do you like about her as a genuine question and he went on about her eyes and her face and I made the joke "well I got all of that and a dick and you don't love me" (keep in mind we can joke around like that and say we love each other because that's how we actually are we were best friends basically brothers) and he just tapped me in the shoulder and smiled at me and that shit hurt. But now all it is, is him talking about his girlfriend and he just cut ties with us and his family for her. So the moral of this fucking story if you ever find yourself in a relationship or even have one. Please don't forget about your friends and family because this situation hurt everyone in it but we have learned to respect his decisions (picture is of the last time he has ever tried to contact us)

 

[Lys_C15H25N3O_d3]

id say the same about getting "married" or moving togheter at an early age like 22s sometimes it can go well sometimes it can't. you work yourself to the limit , do for other what you havent done for friends and family. and in retun, are liable to suffer the drawbacks of being backstabbed and find yourself alone some many years later in a strange city far away from everything, while everyone you "know" or "knew" is already with their happy "dream-lives" (married, children) or just have their own place and a can generate income without having to depend on others, or working with stuff you hate...

 

[Ligand]

This is probably gonna be seen as an insensitive thing to say, but why do you think he owes you anything? This guy that you care deeply about found someone that makes him so happy that he talks to them all day long, and all you can think about is how shitty it makes you feel? How about you feel happy for him, realize that your relationship with him is now changed, and move on?

Bro you know good and damn well that if you lucked out and found a chick like he did, you would be doing the exact same thing. It sucks when shit like this happens- I've had guy friends that do this and we call them " ghost guys," but you generally just laugh about it and move on. Not sure if you're aware of this but when people get into their mid 20s in early 30s they tend to get married and then not hang out with their friends almost at all anymore. My suggestion would be to devote your time to doing something else other than being so fucking hurt and jealous over your friend doing something completely natural and healthy. I mean you're talking about this dude like you were dating him. Go make some new friends or go find a girl yourself. I promise you won't give a shit about this once you have something going on in your life.

 

[LucifersIntrovert]

This is probably gonna be seen as an insensitive thing to say, but why do you think he owes you anything? This guy that you care deeply about found someone that makes him so happy that he talks to them all day long, and all you can think about is how shitty it makes you feel? How about you feel happy for him, realize that your relationship with him is now changed, and move on?

Bro you know good and damn well that if you lucked out and found a chick like he did, you would be doing the exact same thing. It sucks when shit like this happens- I've had guy friends that do this and we call them " ghost guys," but you generally just laugh about it and move on. Not sure if you're aware of this but when people get into their mid 20s in early 30s they tend to get married and then not hang out with their friends almost at all anymore. My suggestion would be to devote your time to doing something else other than being so fucking hurt and jealous over your friend doing something completely natural and healthy. I mean you're talking about this dude like you were dating him. Go make some new friends or go find a girl yourself. I promise you won't give a shit about this once you have something going on in your life.

I know I won't, cutting ties with family and friends over a relationship is something shitty, you can have your own point of view on it but seeing as he doesn't talk to us or his family over a girl? That's something dumb

 

[Ligand]

I know I won't, cutting ties with family and friends over a relationship is something shitty, you can have your own point of view on it but seeing as he doesn't talk to us or his family over a girl? That's something dumb

You can't change the way he acts, you can only change the way you respond to the situation. Once again, go get a girlfriend and see how much you still communicate with your boys (especially in the honeymoon phase) lmao

 

[LucifersIntrovert]

Never mind I see what was wrong with this back and forth in the first place