Long term effects of meth?

[52shriek]

I was wondering if any of you had done (and quit) meth before. I did it for about 4 months straight about a year and a half ago then stopped cold turkey, then took some again in February this year. Again I quit abruptly. The reason why it was abrupt is that I was taking it abroad where I had easy access to it, but back home I don't so I don't bother.

I'm asking this because even though it's been a year and a half, I'm wondering if it could have made my depression far, far worse ultimately. I've always suffered from depression but it's gotten so bad now, I'm wondering if it may have affected my brain permanently.

Ps: we're talking African meth here. Don't know if there are differences between countries...

 

[311]

I was wondering if any of you had done (and quit) meth before. I did it for about 4 months straight about a year and a half ago then stopped cold turkey, then took some again in February this year. Again I quit abruptly. The reason why it was abrupt is that I was taking it abroad where I had easy access to it, but back home I don't so I don't bother.

I'm asking this because even though it's been a year and a half, I'm wondering if it could have made my depression far, far worse ultimately. I've always suffered from depression but it's gotten so bad now, I'm wondering if it may have affected my brain permanently.

Ps: we're talking African meth here. Don't know if there are differences between countries...

African meth is probably so adulterated and probably with bad stuff. Meth can definitely effect your brain chemistry

 

[Jodes]

Why blame and punish yourself more?

 

[52shriek]

Why blame and punish yourself more?

What do you mean? I haven't touched it since that one week in February...

 

[52shriek]

So is there a way to come back from that damage? The numbness in my brain has become unbearable...

 

[Jodes]

What do you mean? I haven't touched it since that one week in February...

I mean, why dwell on it? Stop blaming yourself! You have suffered.

 

[Jodes]

So is there a way to come back from that damage? The numbness in my brain has become unbearable...

Lots of different meds available if you can get them, a good doc helps. No guarantee but if you decide to try that route

 

[52shriek]

I don't really blame myself... (Truth be told, if I had the chance to score it here I would, at least it lifted my mood and dragged me out of my apathy... Finally, I felt *something*)
I'm just hoping there is a way to counteract the long term effects of it.

 

[worldexploder]

I never did meth but from what I read, it can cause long term paranoia.

 

[52shriek]

Umm, interesting. I don't feel necessarily paranoid, except maybe when I assume that meth has impaired something in my brain? Now that would be ironic...

 

[worldexploder]

Umm, interesting. I don't feel necessarily paranoid, except maybe when I assume that meth has impaired something in my brain? Now that would be ironic...

Do you feel any different from before you started talking it?

 

[52shriek]

Do you feel any different from before you started talking it?

Yes... A lot more apathetic, very numb and detached, completely disconnected from everything, and a hell of a lot more depressed.

 

[worldexploder]

Yes... A lot more apathetic, very numb and detached, completely disconnected from everything, and a hell of a lot more depressed.

That could be due to the damage meth did to your synapses. The damaged synapses may not be able to pass on those feel good chemicals like they use to. Then again, your depression may be totally unrelated.

 

[52shriek]

True, I suffered from depression before, since age 11 to be honest. I just think it made it worse, possibly in a similar way to other drugs: they make you elated the whole time (well, 4 months in my case) and you start thinking life is peachy... Then you come back down to earth.

Quitting abruptly was easy too. I slept for about 3 days then went back to my normal routine and that was that. Maybe the backlash is happening now, I don't know. Either way, I definitely already suffered from depression regardless.

 

[Armadillo]

Meth is neurotoxic for dopaminergic and to a lesser extent serotonergic neurons, depression, anhedonia and brain fog are extremely common symptoms for methamphetamine post acute whitdrawal syndrome (PAWS).
Usually those symptoms get way better with time, but it might take a while, 2 years in some cases.
The damages done by the drug, unfortunately, are not completely reversable, even with time.

 

[52shriek]

Thanks for the info, it's much appreciated. This could indeed be post acute withdrawal...
Considering I have a sleeping disorder and anorexic tendencies, I think I went quite far with meth, not so much in terms of quantities, but in terms of destructive behaviour. Everybody was using around me but I was the one definitely staying up the longest as I wanted to enjoy on my own the internal silence that the drug was giving me. A couple times, I went a whole week without sleeping at all.

 

[Fucking loving it]

It becomes less intense over time.

 

[52shriek]

It becomes less intense over time.

Have you been there yourself?

I'm not in touch anymore with the people I used with and I don't know anybody else who took it so I'd like to hear other people's experience, it would help.

 

[Fucking loving it]

Been there done that

 

[52shriek]

And did you experience debilitating depression almost 2 years on? Which eventually faded over time?

 

[Fucking loving it]

The depression from that improved.

 

[MAIO]

So is there a way to come back from that damage? The numbness in my brain has become unbearable...

Come back from what exactly? Do you just want to feel better?

 

[52shriek]

Good question... My depression has reached debilitating heights since and I just want the nightmare to stop.

 

[52shriek]

The problem is, it's a catch 22. Meth made me feel alive, more than I'd ever felt before (I've suffered from depression for as long as I can remember). Taking it combined with the fact that it was overseas, in an exotic country that I love deeply (where I used to rent a flat but my ex boyfriend, who has severe mental issues of his own, has let it go to hell so I can't go back there), all those elements have magnified and glorified the experience. I was already dealing with depression, but now that I'm back home, almost 2 years on, memories of that time are haunting me to the point that I feel like I'm losing my mind. Memories of feeling alive, present, excited, motivated. And now it's all gone.