Humans are born in a capitalist system that lies about being full of freedom. Forced to work and pay bills until their physical bodies fail at old age or before due to injuries or genetics. Having a messed up childhood badly marks a person through no fault of their own, being born into poverty, SA'd, physical violence, genetic markers for addictions, mental illnesses, unavoidable accidents. Outside the scope of the body, background, and genetics, humans do the same repetitive activities year after year.
Sleep, shower, eat, work, sex, no sex, poop, bills, occasional vacations, work, work, work, procreate?, work, sleep, die. All under systems controlled by the rich and their bloodlines.
I am bored, lonely, sad, tired, sick, and see nothing of interest here. I've already seen and done things and nothing matters. The players are the same even if they wear different masks. After time you see through the illusions. Schools and teachers are liars. TV is conditioning and lies. There is nothing of meaning, but children and their innocence before they grow up to learn what the world is. Being attractive or unattractive has no meaning. People use people and you have to watch out for users regardless of what you look like or have.
My mother once said she wished she aborted me. I wish she had. I didn't ask to be here. I reached the level of what I can take. Years of it. I want to die to see what is next. There has to be something better. Every day I fake emotions to not alarm others. I need rest. I tried various things over the years. SN sounds more peaceful than anything I've came across. Being here long term is punishment. I don't want another decade here. More pain and suffering. To exist is to feel pain, but I can't express it to alarm others. I hate being here.
As a human born with free will it is my right to end my life if I want to.
I asked god or whoever for help and none came. I'm not religious, but I was desperate. I once died after pills and alcohol, but they brought me back. I was so pissed off. That story is for another day, but I was so pissed off to wake up back here. I can't describe how pissed off I was years ago. Clearly I should have died then. I can't take a lifetime of being here.
Sleep, shower, eat, work, sex, no sex, poop, bills, occasional vacations, work, work, work, procreate?, work, sleep, die. All under systems controlled by the rich and their bloodlines.
I am bored, lonely, sad, tired, sick, and see nothing of interest here. I've already seen and done things and nothing matters. The players are the same even if they wear different masks. After time you see through the illusions. Schools and teachers are liars. TV is conditioning and lies. There is nothing of meaning, but children and their innocence before they grow up to learn what the world is. Being attractive or unattractive has no meaning. People use people and you have to watch out for users regardless of what you look like or have.
My mother once said she wished she aborted me. I wish she had. I didn't ask to be here. I reached the level of what I can take. Years of it. I want to die to see what is next. There has to be something better. Every day I fake emotions to not alarm others. I need rest. I tried various things over the years. SN sounds more peaceful than anything I've came across. Being here long term is punishment. I don't want another decade here. More pain and suffering. To exist is to feel pain, but I can't express it to alarm others. I hate being here.
As a human born with free will it is my right to end my life if I want to.
I asked god or whoever for help and none came. I'm not religious, but I was desperate. I once died after pills and alcohol, but they brought me back. I was so pissed off. That story is for another day, but I was so pissed off to wake up back here. I can't describe how pissed off I was years ago. Clearly I should have died then. I can't take a lifetime of being here.
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