Life enjoys beating on those who are already down p

[eeeeeedeeeeeden]

I feel like at this point life's the biggest joke going, you find an opportunity to CTB and then reflecting on not going for that- life decides to smack you in the face and drag you deep into the hells of regret. During the SAME 24 HOURS? The circus is waiting because clown season is certainly in full show. How does one find the courage to keep going if terrible things are constantly given to you like a cookie??.

 

[FuneralCry]

Existence really is too unnecessarily cruel, I find it so horrible how there is unlimited potential for existing to get even more unbearable, I could personally never see existence as being desirable, existing just leads to suffering.

 

[BlazingBob]

I feel like at this point life's the biggest joke going, you find an opportunity to CTB and then reflecting on not going for that- life decides to smack you in the face and drag you deep into the hells of regret. During the SAME 24 HOURS? The circus is waiting because clown season is certainly in full show. How does one find the courage to keep going if terrible things are constantly given to you like a cookie??.

I wish I knew. Clown show is right. George Carlin said when you're born you get a ticket to the freak show and when you're born in the US, you get a front row seat. I really wish I were born a heartless asshole because assholes do just great in this asshole of a world. There is no justice or fairness. Never has been never will be. Survival of the fittest. The nicer you are the more shit life will rain down on you.

 

[inviável]

I wish I knew. Clown show is right. George Carlin said when you're born you get a ticket to the freak show and when you're born in the US, you get a front row seat. I really wish I were born a heartless asshole because assholes do just great in this asshole of a world. There is no justice or fairness. Never has been never will be. Survival of the fittest. The nicer you are the more shit life will rain down on you.

Fr. some people say that karma is real and will get people whom done bad things in life, but those who fucked me up are doing great and i'm here being the same open hearted idiot

 

[eeeeeedeeeeeden]

I wish I knew. Clown show is right. George Carlin said when you're born you get a ticket to the freak show and when you're born in the US, you get a front row seat. I really wish I were born a heartless asshole because assholes do just great in this asshole of a world. There is no justice or fairness. Never has been never will be. Survival of the fittest. The nicer you are the more shit life will rain down on you

Precisely, the more you try with positivity the quicker it stomps you out, the more you question the more it simply proves that the more you give the more it takes.

 

[prezmyl]

even though this discussion is more about current emotional states
I will just state a few observations, believes or recycled interpretations from my life that I think could contribute to this unlucky, being punished by destiny living.

once I am in certain downstate of mind (often related to retriggered FFF reaction) that is almost automatically accompanied by fear, guilt, shame, selfhate and mostly my nervous system is strongly activated and its capacity is low than the mind tends to pick up drastically any failure or accident or even little struggle as an inprinted suffering and prove that world is working this punishing way for me and because there is not enough opposite really felt experiences or I am not even able to feel such a state even though also pleasant thing happens to me, than there is nothing to balance that or at least chalange that view. And when some bad thing happens in the moment when I am about to give the life last chance to prove me that I should still be here, than it is really hard to not seeing that as a sign of being doomed.

Also word karma, destiny used to mean different things in different stages of my life, but more than magic force I now more believe that at least partially it is whats been investigated up to some extend that all those subconscious inprints from overhelming experiences(often unfinished survival reaction, also know as trauma) effects the life and things that happens to you. Inprints that are genetically inherited or taken during life as monotraumas or worse as traumas during early development, which are extremally powerful engrams that effect the life the most, especially if they were gain before the ego was formed, thus they are basicaly foreign("psychotic") for the ego.
All these are supposedly rooted in the procedural memory in the oldest the part of the brain (storage of survival reactions, motoric functions, reflexies ect.) and these memories have got the biggest motivation (the power to force you to do things, for simple example it forces you to jump away when a car is about to hit you), so if there is some unfinished more complex business, it tries to force you to the sittuation that at least partially reminds the original situtation when the inprint was created for the first time to give itself a chance to finally complete this survival reaction in satisfactory way. So it somehow draws you to certain situations or at least the probability of certain situation appearing in your life seems to be increased or at least the way you will interpret certain situation seems to be effected by this. So this thing for me contributes to bad things that are happening to me again and again.
So there probably is some mysterious thing that effects your life significantly, though the mechanism at least some of them seems to be sort of investigated, but not well known.

not sure if this make any sense to anyone else here, but I ll be glad to hear your insight and believes, why your suffering is happening.

 

[Andro_USYD]

Kratom helps everything, it helps U endure life & trust me I have suggested the most harmless, working drug that has almost no side effects or effects on health. If Ur feeling depressed constantly this drug will make things so much more tolerable. And depending on where you are it might even be legal

 

[CTB Fella]

As they say, life is a bitch.

 

[アホペンギン]

Yeah, its absurd how instead of genuinely trying to help people who are trying to ctb or who have an opportune chance to do so are just taken to the psych ward or something. People don't even consider actually thinking about what the person wants but rather what will make their social status better- saving someone who is dying, by their own hand. Its disgusting how the society has become like this, all drugs to help with ctb are becoming increasingly more difficulty to obtain and many euthanasia drugs are coming off the market, to avoid the rising ctb rates. Instead of helping people in situations like this, people who are vulnerable, they mock them for feeling this way.

 

[eeeeeedeeeeeden]

Yeah, its absurd how instead of genuinely trying to help people who are trying to ctb or who have an opportune chance to do so are just taken to the psych ward or something. People don't even consider actually thinking about what the person wants but rather what will make their social status better- saving someone who is dying, by their own hand. Its disgusting how the society has become like this, all drugs to help with ctb are becoming increasingly more difficulty to obtain and many euthanasia drugs are coming off the market, to avoid the rising ctb rates. Instead of helping people in situations like this, people who are vulnerable, they mock them for feeling this way.

They want us to simply live in our suffering quietly and complacent, ctb simply raises awareness and they have to act as though they care about these "social issues" when they'd rather just prolong our suffering as long as we do it in the quiet of our own homes.

even though this discussion is more about current emotional states
I will just state a few observations, believes or recycled interpretations from my life that I think could contribute to this unlucky, being punished by destiny living.

once I am in certain downstate of mind (often related to retriggered FFF reaction) that is almost automatically accompanied by fear, guilt, shame, selfhate and mostly my nervous system is strongly activated and its capacity is low than the mind tends to pick up drastically any failure or accident or even little struggle as an inprinted suffering and prove that world is working this punishing way for me and because there is not enough opposite really felt experiences or I am not even able to feel such a state even though also pleasant thing happens to me, than there is nothing to balance that or at least chalange that view. And when some bad thing happens in the moment when I am about to give the life last chance to prove me that I should still be here, than it is really hard to not seeing that as a sign of being doomed.

Also word karma, destiny used to mean different things in different stages of my life, but more than magic force I now more believe that at least partially it is whats been investigated up to some extend that all those subconscious inprints from overhelming experiences(often unfinished survival reaction, also know as trauma) effects the life and things that happens to you. Inprints that are genetically inherited or taken during life as monotraumas or worse as traumas during early development, which are extremally powerful engrams that effect the life the most, especially if they were gain before the ego was formed, thus they are basicaly foreign("psychotic") for the ego.
All these are supposedly rooted in the procedural memory in the oldest the part of the brain (storage of survival reactions, motoric functions, reflexies ect.) and these memories have got the biggest motivation (the power to force you to do things, for simple example it forces you to jump away when a car is about to hit you), so if there is some unfinished more complex business, it tries to force you to the sittuation that at least partially reminds the original situtation when the inprint was created for the first time to give itself a chance to finally complete this survival reaction in satisfactory way. So it somehow draws you to certain situations or at least the probability of certain situation appearing in your life seems to be increased or at least the way you will interpret certain situation seems to be effected by this. So this thing for me contributes to bad things that are happening to me again and again.
So there probably is some mysterious thing that effects your life significantly, though the mechanism at least some of them seems to be sort of investigated, but not well known.

not sure if this make any sense to anyone else here, but I ll be glad to hear your insight and believes, why your suffering is happening.

The brain is wired to take your solid beliefs and cherry pick through your experiences to affirm said beliefs. Unfortunately if you're routinely fucked over by life no matter how much you try to reprogram yourself- so to speak- you'll find yourself in the same pit of despair wondering why life is spitting on you once again. You're right about that, as someone who's struggled with anxiety majority of my life, your brain pulls you back to the original situation that triggered you and begins to send out the distress signal with anything alike until you're no longer able to do anything related to that situation. Your brain will continue to affirm that life is shit to you unless things get better or you have some miracle chance of helping yourself out that deep ass hole.

 

[020x]

We are either being tortured by a sadist or by a clueless existence that has left us alone here with unlimited potential of pain and suffering. Very cruel, very undeserved and very unnecessary. It's just so sad that we have to sit here and accept everything because even leaving this world is extremely hard and scary.