Venting Life Choices

[f1berz]

Why is it so hard for people to accept when someone feels ready to go? I know this may sound harsh-but people get so upset or angry not because they understand how I'm feeling or what's causing all of these emotions, but because my decision and readiness to go might effect THEM.
They want me to keep going and pushing through a life I do not want nor deserve for their comforts? I know this will definitely come off as selfish, but is it really fair for me to endure a life I find miserable just to keep others happy? I try to look at all perspectives when need be but I can't for this-I just can't.
I think it would keep on alive longer if someone told me they thought it would be okay for me to go, if they just gave me the tools,the option..I don't know..

 

[cohomology]

Personally I think it's biological. People naturally form bonds with their close ones and when they lose them they suffer. They don't want the bonds they have to break. You can call it selfish if you want, but to me it just seems like inescapable reality, part of human nature.
I also wish it were possible to erase those bonds and feelings with actions or words without causing pain or suffering. So I could leave without causing any suffering or grief. Alas, that seems impossible.

 

[chester]

Why is it so hard for people to accept when someone feels ready to go?

If I understand correctly, your assumption is that people realize that you can't get better and want you to carry on regardless. I think most people refuse to believe that your situation is as hopeless as you see it and that nothing can be done to improve it. At least that's my observation based on the conversations I've had.

 

[devils~advocate]

I guess in Western cultural norms, this idea of self deliverance is seen as taboo. It seems that it is tied to a lot of things, esp religion etc. In Eastern culture before being influenced by the West, it seemed more acceptable.....Seppuku, etc. But tied to honor, war, etc. I think the idea of this being a result of mental situations....like depression, sadness, mental thoughts, etc.....is where it becomes taboo.
I think the culture in general, feels that they can help solve someones issues and that the thought of doing this to one's self is a 'way out'. So much so, I think some areas of the world can incarcerate those that try to do this to themselves.
They feel that those that wish to do this to themselves, that they don't have control over their actions. Imo Its a fine grey line....we know there are those that have severe mental illness....but society seems to lump everyone into that same group.

Times are changing though. The idea has become increasingly acceptable for those who have illnesses with long term suffering. I guess it will take time for culture and society to look at mental situations (non severe mental illness) in the same light.

But to me, it doesnt matter what the culture, society or world thinks. They can call me 'selfish' or whatever. They didnt live my life. One where Ive been betrayed by loved ones, employers, and society in general. I do feel guilty. Guilty for having my real loved ones..the ones that really care about me..... go thru the grief that they will feel. The grief that will never go away. Its part of the hell in my mind that I live now.

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand as I also feel so tired of suffering, I only wish to never exist again. But anyway I wish you the best.