Discussion Leave it up to faith

[littlehellishlife]

Is it really cruel or weird that I kinda want to use a method that's not 100% successful just to see what happens? I don't want to leave my family without giving them a chance to save me. They have no idea what's going on with me. And I think that whatever happens happens. If they rescue me then I'll live. If not then not.

Has anyone else felt that way?

Also I think that's because I fear death. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to live. I have no future. But just the idea of not knowing what will happen with me after death is terrifying.

 

[sserafim]

No, I'm the opposite. I want to use a method that's 100% successful. I'm sure that I want to die, and I would hate to fail an attempt and be left with permanent damage. That's my biggest fear. Unfortunately, things can always go wrong (lol Murphy's Law: what can go wrong will go wrong), so there is no method that is 100% successful. Wait I guess one method that's always successful would be VAD, but it's heavily restricted and inaccessible.

 

[UKscotty]

Plenty of unreliable methods, most poisons, OD, cutting, ingested things...

However, any method has a risk of being fatal, so there are no ideal cry for help methods.

 

[sserafim]

Plenty of unreliable methods, most poisons, OD, cutting, ingested things...

However, any method has a risk of being fatal, so there are no ideal cry for help methods.

The issue is that it depends on fate though. You don't know the outcome beforehand and you're risking something important (your body/health/well-being). What if you attempt just to fail and be left with permanent damage? That's a fate worse than death in my opinion. The risk and consequences of failure are stopping me from ctb, I wish I could see the future so I could know whether I'd be successful or not.

 

[UKscotty]

The issue is that it depends on fate though. You don't know the outcome beforehand and you're risking something important (your health/well-being). What if you attempt, just to fail and be left with permanent damage?

Exactly. If you want help it's best to just say so. Any method has significant risk to health.

Yes, it might get more attention but in my own experience the health service is too overwhelmed to do anything to help.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

I don't want to leave my family without giving them a chance to save me. They have no idea what's going on with me. And I think that whatever happens happens

Sounds like you need to consider if its worth the risk of attempting in the first place in order to give your family a chance to save you first which by then, you might end up with some kind of permanent damage.

 

[Chronosphere]

How do you imagine what's going to happen if they'll save you? Maybe you should just have a serious talk with them instead?
Failed attempt will make things more difficult afterwards.

 

[LifeIsCrazyNemb]

Is it really cruel or weird that I kinda want to use a method that's not 100% successful just to see what happens? I don't want to leave my family without giving them a chance to save me. They have no idea what's going on with me. And I think that whatever happens happens. If they rescue me then I'll live. If not then not.

Has anyone else felt that way?

Also I think that's because I fear death. Don't get me wrong, I don't want to live. I have no future. But just the idea of not knowing what will happen with me after death is terrifying.

Hello
Clearly you are not ready to CTB and you want help from your family. In this case, trying any method just for the sake of being rescued could probably just complicate things even morer.

Have you tried to openly talk to ur family about this issue and ask for help? Maybe suggest them to pay you for a good therapist and a session with a psychiatrist? Regardless its worth trying to talk to them in you case.

good luck

 

[Homo erectus]

Perhaps many people don't actually hate life itself. They just can't cope with their present circumstances and want a reset, whatever it might be.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

In this case, trying any method just for the sake of being rescued could probably just complicate things even morer.

Agreed, i don't understand why op would even go that far to endanger thier lives in order to give their family a chance to save them, it doesn't make sense because it does sound like they aren't ready to consider the gravity of the consequences of such a decision.

If anything, I find it cruel to do to your loved ones this way so that they might save and then decide to live, these are things to consider before getting to ctb.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

Perhaps many people don't actually hate life itself. They just can't cope with their present circumstances and want a reset, whatever it might be.

This is what I noticed too. I think that a few suicidal people hate life itself whereas the majority of suicidal people don't. The majority of suicidal people just wish that their life circumstances was better instead. In my case, I hate life itself as life can never be better for me due to my neurotype and there's nothing about life that I enjoy but I know that this isn't the case for many suicidal people.

 

[LifeIsCrazyNemb]

Agreed, i don't understand why op would even go that far to endanger thier lives in order to give their family a chance to save them, it doesn't make sense because it does sound like they aren't ready to consider the gravity of the consequences of such a decision.

If anything, I find it cruel to do to your loved ones this way so that they might save and then decide to live, these are things to consider before getting to ctb.

@Goku Black
remember other thread that i mentionated few cases where the person "unconscioulsy" make a mistake or error in their attemp as a way to get help?
This may be one of those cases.

 

[Meteora]

I can relate just that nobody really saved me or let's say things did not get better after the attempts. So this time I want to be 100% sure.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

remember other thread that i mentionated few cases where the person "unconscioulsy" make a mistake or error in their attemp as a way to get help?
This may be one of those cases.

I see what you meant now, I think it's more common than I thought.

unconscioulsy

Subconsciously.

 

[Homo erectus]

Agreed, i don't understand why op would even go that far to endanger thier lives in order to give their family a chance to save them, it doesn't make sense because it does sound like they aren't ready to consider the gravity of the consequences of such a decision.

If anything, I find it cruel to do to your loved ones this way so that they might save and then decide to live, these are things to consider before getting to ctb.

Perhaps it is a feature of system and equilibrium. Like losing weight, it works for a while but it will go back to the original weight soon. Small gestures like talking don't always work. Sometimes people are attracted to taking more drastic actions.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

Small gestures like talking don't always work. Sometimes people are attracted to taking more drastic actions.

I get it but I just don't think Op should go that far.

 

[Homo erectus]

This is what I noticed too. I think that a few suicidal people hate life itself whereas the majority of suicidal people don't. The majority of suicidal people just wish that their life circumstances was better instead. In my case, I hate life itself as life can never be better for me due to my neurotype and there's nothing about life that I enjoy but I know that this isn't the case for many suicidal people.

Everyone has different reasons to ctb. But public discussions still tend to stay at a stage of (deliberately) confusing suicide with killing, and disapproving it. That's why I think euthanasia is a good idea. It give the decision back or closer to the individuals who actually suffer. It would be more efficient than some one size fits all screening done by some out of touch "professionals". With that final option in hand, people will be able take more risk in life to improve their living condition, which might actually reduce the need for suicide.