Realistically, my survival instinct will probably take over after I drink the SN. I'll probably feel very scared and anxious, and I might regret my decision at that moment. As the SN starts to take effect, I'll still be anxious but thinking a bit more clearly. I'll probably remember my family, loved ones, past friends and experiences, and dwell on the fact that I will no longer be here in a few minutes. My last thought will likely be an apology to my family and those who care about me before I slip out of consciousness and exit this world.
This is heartbreaking, but I can imagine myself thinking similar things.
I honestly believe they will be better off without me in the long run. But I acknowledge it will be upsetting to them in the immediate aftermath.
11 is still very young :-(
I relate so much. Despite my own problems, I'm still trying to hold onto hope so that I can protect them. But at the same time I believe they would be better off and my husband should remarry to have a more active and fun life.
This. I am such a drag. My ex and his new girlfriend took my daughter to the Waterpark a few weekends ago. She had such a good time. I took her and my son last weekend and I literally just sat in the lounge chair and cried the whole time. They did not have fun. It was a complete waste of time and money. Every activity that includes me ends up sucking. They are always walking on eggshells around me. Trying not to set me off. It's exhausting for everyone
Thank you. The situation is untenable.
