I've been feeling suicidal for a while, and today I took a huge dose of paracetamol (8000mg in less than 12 hours) and my belly is swelling and I'm feeling pain on the right side of my belly behind my chest area, I believe it's my liver reacting to the effects and now I'm concerned because it may take a slow process of agonising pain. For me t's quite tempting to have paracetamol here.
Dear Frustrated Mind,
I am so sorry that you are going through so much and you have taken so much paracetamol in less than 12 hours.
I am penning this as I have a habit of overdosing on paracetamol - often when dissociated and then realise part way through. Anyway most of the time. I have not bothered attending A&E - but I know my limits and my body is probably used to taking a batterig anyway. The time I was hospitalised as because I had taken far too many and blood tests revealed the high toxicity in the liver. If we want to die, it is our right to do so. But an overdose of paracetamol might kill - but if it does, my understanding is that it will be incredibly slow and painful death over a period of weeks. Bit there is a higher chance of long term liver damage and suffering and it is not worth that much pain. Seriously please consider hmgetting medical help. If you are in the UK, go to A&E, call an ambulance - being treated with dignity and courtesy by all staff is questionable, but most of them are okay. If you don't want to end up in psych ward, just tell them that you were in a lot of pain and had been taking the tablets over 12 hours before realising how much you had taken - technically not a lie as it is emotional pain. If they don't consider you to be a danger tonyourself or others, they will discharge you after giving you an antidote over three days (you need to stay in as this is given by IV).
The decision is totally yours, but I really hope that you choose the option where suffering can be reduced. Feel free to pm me if you need to talk.
Thinking of you. Good Luck. Take care.
