Ketamine infusion

[s3gfault]

I mentioned before that I was going to wait to have this done as a last resort to help with my headaches but was annoyed about having to wait for yet ANOTHER procedure just for it to most likely fail. Well, I got lucky in that we were able to set it up for an accelerated schedule, meaning starting this Monday I will get one a day for 6 days. I should know after the first few if it is going to help at all. So, all the chips are down. Either this helps or I'm done. I have an SN kit prepared with a bottle marked off at the 50ml mark, 25g SN, 800mg Tagamet, 4mg Ativan, 4 ibuprofen, and ~1g Propranolol (I happened to already be taking this). I'm on 400mg nightly of Quetiapine so I don't have to bother with meto.

Plan:
Wake up and don't drink or eat anything
Check into local hotel
T-1hr
4mg Ativan
4 Ibuprofen
T-45min
800mg Tagamet
T-0
SN with Propranolol
T+5hrs
Suicide note automatically sent to certain people via Facebook. Location of body sent to parents, or possibly an automated 911 text to come pick up the body.

I'll keep you guys up to date.

 

[SSlostallhope]

Where is ketamine involved?

 

[s3gfault]

Where is ketamine involved?

It's a treatment for my chronic pain. I've been through dozens over the past two years. This is the last one I'm going to try before I've had enough.

 

[GerMann]

You' ve got medical descripted keta treatment for chronic pain? That is unusual. Where and how long did you have your pain?

 

[s3gfault]

You' ve got medical descripted keta treatment for chronic pain? That is unusual. Where and how long did you have your pain?

They are diagnosed as "tension headaches" but there's clearly something else going on as every traditional treatment method (and some untraditional ones) has failed. When they get bad it feels like someone is stabbing me in the head or behind the eye. Any type of mental activity slowly worsens them throughout the day until they become intolerable. Similar to the Adam Maier-Clayton case.

Over 2 years now.

 

[GerMann]

Drink a lot of water, no heat... no bright light, (no coffein?) no binge watching PC, to much sorrow?
Try to change your consume, because keta is no sugar-sweet. Your brain have to learn new rules.
Your Pain is only in you brain. Like a fog over a lake.

 

[s3gfault]

Drink a lot of water, no heat... no bright light, (no coffein?) no binge watching PC, to much sorrow?
Try to change your consume, because keta is no sugar-sweet. Your brain have to learn new rules.
Your Pain is only in you brain. Like a fog over a lake.

Sorry dude you have no idea I'm the one who's been living with it the past two years trust me there's nothing that you could think of that I haven't already tried.

 

[Aap]

Tension headaches? Not cluster or migraine? So sorry.

 

[s3gfault]

Tension headaches? Not cluster or migraine? So sorry.

They behave like cluster / migraine when they get bad. It's almost like a weird combination of all three.

 

[GerMann]

Seems you really suffer, but keta is not a longtime medizin. It is like Tinnitus, try to find a healthy way

 

[s3gfault]

Seems you really suffer, but keta is not a longtime medizin. It is like Tinnitus, try to find a healthy way

The doctor I just went to today said her daughter had migraines for years and she did keta just a few times and it worked wonders. Now she just has to do one occasionally "re-up" or whatever you would call it.

Of course I'm not getting my hopes up because I've been told by dozens of doctors over two years that they were sure they could help me and none of them have. That's why I'm planning for worst case.

Weirdly enough I think I almost don't want it to help at all. If it only partially helps then I'll still be fucked just with slightly less pain to deal with and a new regimen of shit I have do that I have to wait months to see if it will improve things. If it doesn't help I can say "oh well at least I tried" and finally tap out. And everyone would understand because everything about my situation is bullshit.

 

[Nohopeinhell]

I get ketamine infusions. They do helpnsomewhat for my chronic pain, but not enough (CRPS) I also take prescribed oral ketamine every day also. Good luck with your treatment

 

[s3gfault]

I got my first treatment today. The initial hit was fucked up... my anxiety went through the roof and my symptoms increased to the point I felt like was literally being dragged through hell. Honestly probably the most scared I've ever been in my life. The doctor I'm working with slowed things down and eventually things sort of normalized. I then felt a reduction in pain and what I'm assuming one of the things most people are looking for when they take it recreationally, which was just an overall feeling of well-being, connectedness and peacefulness, lowered ego defenses, and just being in love with everyone and everything. Honestly not all that different from a weed high.

The doctor said I shouldn't have as much anxiety in my next infusions which I hope so as I never want to go through that again. I think it was largely just being scared of a new drug because I felt the effects immediately and it was much more intense than what I was expecting, and then anxiety is one of the triggers of my symptoms so it's a self-feeding cycle.

It's possible this might actually help me as I seem to be feeling a bit better after the treatment and I still have 5 to go, though I'm not going to get my hopes up. We'll see. If it doesn't I'll CTB as originally planned.

 

[s3gfault]

Had my fourth infusion today.

Before my second I took a Xanax and two Ativan which made things go much smoother. I basically skated through the whole thing. However I later mentioned this to the doctor administering the keta and he said this may make it less effective. So for my third one (yesterday) I didn't take anything and I again had a bad experience but managed to make it through. That night I felt better than I had in a while, though it may because I took a nap after the appointment.

Today I wasn't feeling good before and pretty much knew things were going to go badly, which they did even after he slowed the infusion rate (again these experiences are basically like being dragged through hell). He then gave me some benzos and I coasted after that until near the end where I started feeling like shit again and I had to stop before it was finished (80% of the way through).

I can't tell if it's helping or not. He said I should be feeling better after 3 or 4 sessions but I'm not sure I notice much difference.

I just want this whole experience to be over. I don't think I'll know until after I return home and can test how I feel.

 

[Deformationalplagio]

Did they took a 3dct scan already? Could be something wrong with the skull like intracranial presure. Also get your upper cervical vertebrae checked could be your brainstem being locked between c1 and c2

 

[Escape Artist]

I have horrible headaches too. I was born with a brain malformation that led to a long cavity in my spine. I had surgeries over 10 years ago and it helped but my headaches are back. I also have a lot of other pain throughout my body.

I've also had ketamine infusions and it was hecking terrifying. "You might feel dream-like or like you're floating"... UH no. There was no way I could prepare. They should have said "you will be scared out of your wits in a way that you are currently unable to come close to comprehending in your current state of consciousness". I've had severe panic attacks before but that was something ELSE.

At certain points I felt the pain lift and also some sense of meaning and reason for living appeared. It was brief. I think my brain is too far gone.

but I also got a prescription ketamine nasal spray that they make for me at a compounding pharmacy. I use it every night. It gives me a short bit of relief from pain and anhedonia, but not enough.

I sincerely wish you luck and hope that the infusions are helpful.

 

[Meditation guide]

also got a prescription ketamine nasal spray that they make for me at a compounding pharmacy.

I don't know where you guys live but where I live doctors don't do anything for me at all like giving me a prescription for something which might actually help. They do nothing at all. I can pay about $500 for a ketamine treatment however.

If I just had a good doctor who would actually prescribe something strong, or even a tranquilizer, it would help but no. They are not about to do that for me.

 

[s3gfault]

Did they took a 3dct scan already? Could be something wrong with the skull like intracranial presure. Also get your upper cervical vertebrae checked could be your brainstem being locked between c1 and c2

Already done, nothing out of the ordinary.

I have horrible headaches too. I was born with a brain malformation that led to a long cavity in my spine. I had surgeries over 10 years ago and it helped but my headaches are back. I also have a lot of other pain throughout my body.

I've also had ketamine infusions and it was hecking terrifying. "You might feel dream-like or like you're floating"... UH no. There was no way I could prepare. They should have said "you will be scared out of your wits in a way that you are currently unable to come close to comprehending in your current state of consciousness". I've had severe panic attacks before but that was something ELSE.

At certain points I felt the pain lift and also some sense of meaning and reason for living appeared. It was brief. I think my brain is too far gone.

but I also got a prescription ketamine nasal spray that they make for me at a compounding pharmacy. I use it every night. It gives me a short bit of relief from pain and anhedonia, but not enough.

I sincerely wish you luck and hope that the infusions are helpful.

Yes that was what my first treatment felt like towards the beginning. And then the amazimg feeling of being high / connected and in love with everything and everyone towards the end. I definitely felt anxious during my other ones but nothing close to that, and no good high feelings unfortunately.

 

[Elbarado]

I bet you did, but did you see a good physio therapeut, i had pretty bad headaches in the past, pain behind the eyes, headaches, nausea and vomitting, it came from my neck muscles.

Keep us updated about the keta, i wish you the best

I only did keta once, but that was on a techno party :D

 

[s3gfault]

I bet you did, but did you see a good physio therapeut, i had pretty bad headaches in the past, pain behind the eyes, headaches, nausea and vomitting, it came from my neck muscles.

Keep us updated about the keta, i wish you the best

I only did keta once, but that was on a techno party :D

I did did many physical therapy sessions / manipulations with a number of specialists. They all seemed to agree that the pain was coming from the neck but none of them could produce any positive results.

 

[s3gfault]

Had my final therapy today. Got through the last two sessions by taking Ativan beforehand. Not sure of the results yet. Will update how I'm feeling this week.

 

[s3gfault]

Yesterday was my last day of therapy. I played piano a lot today (several hours) which is one of the things that makes my head pain worse, but I went swimming which is one of the things that makes me feel better. I don't feel great and am definitely going to need Xanax tonight. I'll give it a little more time but this doesn't bode well. If I can't play piano for just a couple of hours even with exercise, there's no way I will be able to work full time and handle all of the necessary things throughout the day that living requires. Looks like I will most likely be CTB. I'll give it another week (I've waited this long, I can wait a little longer) just to see.

 

[s3gfault]

Things are not improved. I will CTB at the earliest chance.

 

[Aap]

I'm so sorry