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PoisonedOxygen

PoisonedOxygen

Member
May 20, 2023
66
I just felt like i'm gonna do an update, also need to push out some negative emotions out and be a fool carelessly so enjoy


Since my cancelled ctb plan a year ago things have been going really well, found a job, quit it, found new one, quit (is the quitting part good what is she talking about). Yeah i just, you know want more, but the fact i had income was good and felt like i am stable. Now im changing jobs for a better one. Since then my mood and mental health was perfect but it started to deterioate slowly during these months. I started to lose weight again, i have no appetite and i do nothing all day again. I'm not gonna give up of course. I did and egg cleansing 2 days ago, a day after my headphones fell to a bowl with water, i thought fuck it was suppose to clean all evil eyes not put bad luck on me? But the headphones work fine now? So i dont know if you do limpia please direct message me, maybe im doing something wrong. I'm an atheist but since tarot cards have worked for me i believe them and cleansing very much. I still have no one, i have a dating site profile with 260 unread messages, i just look at them and i don't respond. Whats wrong with me? In previous work a guy was hitting on me, he was really nice bought me gifts, do everything perfectly like i dreamt of but i didnt feel anything so i just turned him down. I cant form any relationships nor friends, nor love. I'm alone i havent done anything for the past week just lay and scroll through on my phone and im mad on myself. I still live with my mother but when i work she doesnt have much time to abuse me and i think it is a little better with it anyway. I have one big disadvantage i cant and dont know how to give up. I dont know i feel like my personality switched and i type like a little kid going mad i need stability and to clean my head. I think this med for allergy/eating problems is messing with my head and makes my mind tangled. I'm hard on myself all the time and judge my actions, thoughts, everything all the time.
 
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