Venting just when i thought it might get better

[waffels]

for a a little less then a week i thought "things are looking up, this is nice." then everything crashes down again and i'm back to my original plan of ctbing around early august. why does my happiness come in burst? or is it even real happiness i might've been masking but i really don't know at this point.

 

[AerialBoundaries]

It happens to me a lot. A temporary high, followed by a permanent low. It's horrible when life gets your hopes up.

 

[stillmirenai]

Man I hate when that happens. I feel like maybe I might turn my life around finally, but it's actually my brain's delusional mania episodes talking.

 

[FuneralCry]

The reality is that hope is just a delusion to inevitably lead to more suffering once one is forced to confront reality. Existence is so incredibly cruel and disappointing, it's just the harsh truth about existing here, the removal of anything that is seen as positive by someone will just lead to more pain.

 

[SoftWorries]

Sometimes it's hormonal. I'm learning to just try to ride the waves during the good times.

I'm considering writing myself letters when I'm feeling good because when I'm down I can't remember what it was like.

 

[woh6]

Ahh yes, I suffered from the opposite of this. I've always felt empty but then I'd have periods of even more intense emptiness, sadness, no motivation, etc. Sometimes would last a few hours or day(s). Sucked because it really hindered the plans I made during my "happy" periods and sent me spiraling into wanting to ctb every time