Just in case CTB - making a Will

[dandan]

Yes, im considering CTB with N I already have an option.
When I've been in successful Recovery for 3 years, hormone depression is gone, thanks to TRT (Testosterone Replacement Therapy)
I am deep down depressed only because of work, having to work, my brain does not meet requirements to keep me working, my mind is way to disperse and depressed because of bad decisions I can not recover from.

The thing is my own Family did not listened to me 11, 12 years ago when I was seriously depressed, attempting to kill myself
I begged, cried, shouted, got angry asking them to please please please help me and buy some Bitcoin because I knew it could be a safe deposit box which will grow and help me during hard times at work, which I am not being successful anymore
Its difficult to go from having in my own laptop more than 2million dollars worth of Crypto (worth today, and my family did not helped me to pay a fine back then and force me to sold my Crypto which i can not recover) , yes, it was me who clicked the button, but because if I did not I was going to jail for not paying the fine because of a car crash.

So the thing is while making a will,
im planning on leaving most of my things to my girlfriend, most of them, the highest value, is a house and credit I own, so I'm signing the will on the house on next Thursday.

I could leave it to my mom or brother,
but come on, the house is worth 2 Bitcoin today, and my family did not spend $100 dollars back then even when I begged so much for a year or more, I begged for nearly 3 years, and almost everyday, my family told me not to ask them to buy Bitcoin anymore.

I feel I am a little of a bad person by not leaving it to my mom, but come on, it was only $100 damn dollars she did not even wanted to pay for some Bitcoin , so I feel its like a punishment I am giving them.
Not only killing myself but thats something on me because of my lack of courage to be an uber driver, going from 2millioni dollar worth to being an uber driver (just using my imagination of what I could do if I leave my job, not even than because I can not purchase a new car required for Uber driving)

So, I just wanted to vent around, have to work now,

 

[FuneralCry]

I envy those with the option of Nembutal, it really sounds like the most ideal method and it must be a relief to have that. But anyway I wish you the best with your plans.

 

[dandan]

I envy those with the option of Nembutal, it really sounds like the most ideal method and it must be a relief to have that. But anyway I wish you the best with your plans.

I've have had N in my fridge for 3 years now, its been 2 years since its expired, but they say its should still be good if its well kept. So I have it in the fridge with black box and tape around.
and yes, its has been comforting having N in the fridge, as the bag method did not work, my only time with a Cocaine injection did not worked, and car crash accident did not work either.
Thank you for your post
Wishing me the best, would be starting a business and finding a way to enjoy daily life!!! <3 best wishes to you too!! it has just been to much for me.
Making a will was also missing!!! I can not leave all my belongings lost in the wind
like 5k or 6k, instead of 2mil damm....
all of my passwords and 2FA accounts
cellphone passwords, etc