Cannot believe the pit I am in. I'm forced to take medcations that zombify me for 6 years straight now. Never have been able to get off of them and yes I have heard of survivingantidepressants.org. Didn't work for me.
Few depressing facts about me
30 years old, mentally ill
No car, no job, no girlfriend, hell I don't even have a bed or bedroom. Live at home with a psychotic family.
addicted to cigarettes 2 years now
My only hobby is working out and I get no results from it because I am on antipsychotics
My household is very verbally abusive. I live with a tyrant younger brother who is always screaming, yelling and breaking shit. I don't know what to do. I almost took off walking without my medication. I called my dad and he said "get a job and move out". My god how many times i've though about that. Nobody in their right mind would hire me though. I don't even know where to start. Don't know how to drive. Can barely do manual labor at all. Don't understand filling out paperwork.
This world is especially fucked because everyone is just out for themselves. A woman can get a guy to provide for her, or hell do it herself, most of them nowadays do. But a guy with a mental illness. It's just "get a job you fuckin bum". Without realizing that we cannot take of that responsibility. There should be help for people out there who can't take care of themselves, but there isn't. That's just a sad fact.
So with bills piled to the ceiling, no food in the fridge, I am spending what money I will have available for the money on a 7 foot 1 inch pullup bar tower and a strong rope. I'm going to make a hangmans noose and set it up to where I am fully off the ground. I haven't read too much into the guides, but people have been successfully killing themselves for a long time. I'm not gonna overcomplicate this. Just gonna get it done.
Few depressing facts about me
30 years old, mentally ill
No car, no job, no girlfriend, hell I don't even have a bed or bedroom. Live at home with a psychotic family.
addicted to cigarettes 2 years now
My only hobby is working out and I get no results from it because I am on antipsychotics
My household is very verbally abusive. I live with a tyrant younger brother who is always screaming, yelling and breaking shit. I don't know what to do. I almost took off walking without my medication. I called my dad and he said "get a job and move out". My god how many times i've though about that. Nobody in their right mind would hire me though. I don't even know where to start. Don't know how to drive. Can barely do manual labor at all. Don't understand filling out paperwork.
This world is especially fucked because everyone is just out for themselves. A woman can get a guy to provide for her, or hell do it herself, most of them nowadays do. But a guy with a mental illness. It's just "get a job you fuckin bum". Without realizing that we cannot take of that responsibility. There should be help for people out there who can't take care of themselves, but there isn't. That's just a sad fact.
So with bills piled to the ceiling, no food in the fridge, I am spending what money I will have available for the money on a 7 foot 1 inch pullup bar tower and a strong rope. I'm going to make a hangmans noose and set it up to where I am fully off the ground. I haven't read too much into the guides, but people have been successfully killing themselves for a long time. I'm not gonna overcomplicate this. Just gonna get it done.
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