serah
Student
- May 6, 2020
- 177
its really hard to find the motivation to live when you feel worthless and hate yourself. my social anxiety doesnt help. i rely on other people to feel happy. i dont know how to live with myself, i dont know who i am. id become anyone if it meant people would care about me. its so fucking hard living when you walk into every single room and feel like you're the worst person there. i hate my moodswings. i hate how sensitive i am. i get so offended at everything because i have no self worth and the very little ive created is based off other peoples opinions of me. i live for others. how could i be happy living as myself. i dont know who i am. sometimes it feels likw im just playing an act to get attention from those around me. its so tiring. all the real me does is cry about how much i wish i could die. my medicatuon stopped working. and therapy feels like advice i wont ever take because my mind convinces me it'll never work. that i'll never be able to live as a normal person.