Venting Just a vent.....Thoughts welcome

[JasVonD]

Just a vent....

Idk how much longer I can deal. Each CTB method available to me doesn't seem to be effective. Mind you, I'm an MS patient with several other co-occurring lifelong medical conditions. I'm tired of being sick and tired, I'm tired of always being on the verge of losing the house and utilities, I'm tired of pushing myself beyond my capabilities. I'm tired of living with hoarders. I can always seem to justify my reasons to CTB but I don't want it to be painful, I already live with enough pain.

 

[prettyclam]

Just a vent....

Idk how much longer I can deal. Each CTB method available to me doesn't seem to be effective. Mind you, I'm an MS patient with several other co-occurring lifelong medical conditions. I'm tired of being sick and tired, I'm tired of always being on the verge of losing the house and utilities, I'm tired of pushing myself beyond my capabilities. I'm tired of living with hoarders. I can always seem to justify my reasons to CTB but I don't want it to be painful, I already live with enough pain.

The worst thing about planning ctb is realizing how little methods there are that aren't painful or difficult to execute. For hanging you worry about position, for sn it may not be available, for jumping you could survive... sadly theres not much that's 100% effective. On top of living with pain, dying is pain too. It sucks. I understand how you feel❤

 

[FuneralCry]

I really understand feeling so tired, it's just so cruel and dreadful to me how there's all this suffering in existing and it really sounds like you've suffered so much, I wish you the best, I hope you find the relief you search for.