Venting Jealous of people who have friends

[AllReturnsToNothing]

Does anyone else get incredibly jealous of people who have good happy friend groups? Not just seeing a group of people irl who seem to be happy and having a good time but online friend groups as well? For instance I follow a few smaller creators online, many of which know each other and are genuinely really funny people whose interests align with mine and are similar in age and I see them interact with one another and they have so much fun just being in each other's company and I'm reminded of my friends from High School and how much fun we had and how much we cared about each other and it just hurts so damn much whenever I see this sort of camaraderie that I just can't have anymore. It makes me so sad and mad to see this which feels kinda shitty too and occasionally when I'm feeling really bad and I'm scrolling through social media and I see something related to them and being happy with friends I feel compelled to leave a mean comment. Luckily I have the self-control not to do something totally shitty like that coupled with the fear of possibly being humiliated for being a dick. I don't want to be a dick, it just hurts so much to see people like you in situations where they're thriving when you're busy dying. It's like seeing an alternate reality version of yourself through a looking glass and it hurts like hell that you couldn't be living in that reality.

 

[draw a circle]

Yeah.... my best friend (one of the closest; I have a few friends but little to no groups and we don't do much talking except with this one) recently joined a fandom group and they made friends so easily. Everyone in that platform, at least the ones that joined around the same time as us, knows them and most are friends with them, sometimes with me also. I don't really enjoy spending most of my day on it so I only popped up every now and then, but they have so many friends and seem to be having fun. I feel bad because we joined the group together but I rarely show up. When I said I want to stop joining them (it has some kind of roleplay going on and we have jobs there) and they said I was leaving them and that they will be sad. Well, I'm in the real world though? Come out here and talk to me maybe? Even when we hang out, all they do is talk to his friends and every conversation we have is always about it (a lot of drama in the group). I can leave anytime I guess but then I will lose one more common thing between us and I'm scared that they will leave me for good. Me being depressed is also not helping, I'm nothing compared to their new friends.

 

[falloutcarter13]

I think for some of us, the happiness at interacting with other people is just an act, a mask we're taught to wear from birth. I know its like that for me. I have friends, online and off, who I really care about and I know care about me. They enjoy my company and I *try* to enjoy theirs, but underlying it all is a feeling of being misunderstood. I know if they knew my real thoughts and feelings, I would just confuse them. They don't really know the real me, because its not "safe" to show them. It would pop their little bubble that protects them from the world. Being surrounded by friends can make you feel even lonelier when you feel/think this way, and sometimes I wish I could just *be* alone. The exception is this place...everybody here knows *exactly* what I'm feeling and they don't judge me for it.

 

[foreverlikethestars]

feel you. made it through my entire life without having a friend in person and I guess I dont really feel completely attached to the group of online friends i've been with for a few years now.

 

[Deleted member 19276]

It's truly a terrible feeling, not having anyone in real life to relate with or rely on.
With humans being social beings, it can be very difficult to control the loneliness or solitude.
A bit like how SI works, the being alone part can also be a great personal punisher to deal with.
I've been mostly alone since 2012 now, with little interaction that don't last happening in between.
Mostly relying on the web to seek out people.
Better than nothing I guess, but still... Wishing at times I had some to hang out with... To enjoy a meal or have a few laughs with. Could make everything so much more bearable. :/

 

[grungeCat]

Yes, it irritates me how easy people make friends too. I've joined various fandoms and online chats but it has never made out for me. I saw people building their relations with each other from scratch and I was never be able to comprehend how it works. I don't know why. I was sure I have some sort of ASD but proffessional tests didn't show anything. Maybe it's lack of confidence. Eventually seeing people happy and communicating with each other started to piss me off rather than make me sad. Not exactly what you meant but I get your point.

 

[AllReturnsToNothing]

Yes, it irritates me how easy people make friends too. I've joined various fandoms and online chats but it has never made out for me. I saw people building their relations with each other from scratch and I was never be able to comprehend how it works. I don't know why. I was sure I have some sort of ASD but proffessional tests didn't show anything. Maybe it's lack of confidence. Eventually seeing people happy and communicating with each other started to piss me off rather than make me sad. Not exactly what you meant but I get your point.

Actually no that sounds remarkably similar to what I've been going through. I've tried joining some discord servers to try and socialize and make friends but no matter what I always feel like the odd one out and that I don't belong. Like, everyone already has their niche in the group and I'm just an outsider coming in and making things worse for everyone. Hell part of the reason I joined this site was that I almost ctb'ed after I left another discord server that I just felt like I'd never belong in. Funny thing is that it was a server specifically for lonely people lol.

 

[Journeytoletgo]

I

Does anyone else get incredibly jealous of people who have good happy friend groups? Not just seeing a group of people irl who seem to be happy and having a good time but online friend groups as well? For instance I follow a few smaller creators online, many of which know each other and are genuinely really funny people whose interests align with mine and are similar in age and I see them interact with one another and they have so much fun just being in each other's company and I'm reminded of my friends from High School and how much fun we had and how much we cared about each other and it just hurts so damn much whenever I see this sort of camaraderie that I just can't have anymore. It makes me so sad and mad to see this which feels kinda shitty too and occasionally when I'm feeling really bad and I'm scrolling through social media and I see something related to them and being happy with friends I feel compelled to leave a mean comment. Luckily I have the self-control not to do something totally shitty like that coupled with the fear of possibly being humiliated for being a dick. I don't want to be a dick, it just hurts so much to see people like you in situations where they're thriving when you're busy dying. It's like seeing an alternate reality version of yourself through a looking glass and it hurts like hell that you couldn't be living in that reality.

yes it's very painful. Although my life sucked in high school at least I had people around. Now I am incredibly lonely after high school just unattached, disconnected, lost, moody, miserable. It's sad how close people are yet so far away they are. Unfortunately I died a long time ago I'm realizing I haven't enjoyed life since age 14. That's 14 years of lack of fulfillment and enjoyment, people know I'm not okay because they ask me if I am but I tell them I am but deep down inside I know I'm not. There is only so much loneliness one can take, bullying, being unattractive and just feeling unconnected from people. Anyway not much longer I have to put up with this

 

[Celerity]

Yeah, I'm not sure if jealousy is the right word for how I feel. I don't necessarily resent people who have more friends than me. I just feel so alien to them. I resent them for other reasons, like being selfish and flaky.

 

[usernamerequired]

Sometimes its hard to look at all those extrovert people with all their happy friend groups and then i look at myself like... why cant i be like them? I suffer from horrible social anxiety and it is extremely hard to even just talk to the clerk at the cornerstore irl, and it is way easier for me to just make friends online. Am i weird for that? I dont know. it is just... easier. And i dont need someone to be here here. I just need someone to be here, in thoughts. Thats all that matters to me.
So sometimes i get jealous of people for having all those friends... because I hate being alone. But then again, i am happy for them too. For not having to suffer like i do. I wish things were easier, but they arent. Maybe one day they will be, who knows?

 

[Makko]

I don't want to be a dick, it just hurts so much to see people like you in situations where they're thriving when you're busy dying.

They're not really like you.

 

[Callie Arcale]

Does anyone else get incredibly jealous of people who have good happy friend groups?

No, I only get jealous of two categories of people: healthy ones and dead ones.

 

[FuneralCry]

The way I see it, people are disappointing and can let you down. I guess personally I'm better suited for being on my own, and I do not have the energy for friends, it is just my personality. I am distanced from the friends I used to have. I just generally feel disconnected to others.