I think of Ted Cruz who went to Harvard and Princeton and who is still pretending to be one of us. A common average dude and he does that for example by purposely lying on climate change.
I wish I was Ivy league educated. But my mind might be even too fragile to finish my bachelor's degree. I educated myself by watching stuff on youtube. I already watched a lot of lectures. I thought of listening to psychoanalysis but it always makes me bitter thinking of how horrendous my parents raised me. And how good my life could have been.
I am ambivalent. The elite gets educated there. A lot of them are conceited and look down at the average Joe and Jane. US colleges are still probably the best of the world. The pressure is allegedly insane so much that wanting to get an A at Haravard or similar colleges leads to a mental breakdown usually
I think for wanting to be an intellectual one has to get a good education. Sadly I am neither that extraordinary smart or educated. I am very thoughtful still. And my superpower to post infinite threads is worthwhile. My whole brain would probably be completely different if I was healthy. All men in the family of my dad have depression. My dad is in my opinion in a very bad shape cognitively. Maybe the manic part of my mind made me sharp but the price I pay is insane. Either way I think even if I was completely healthy I would not have had a great career. I had a way better life but I would never have had reached the peak I wanted to. I think I would have become a frustrated careerist stuck in a bureaucracy. The bond with my friends has become pretty deep since my mental collapse. But love related I am totally cursed. Maybe my qualities are better used posting creative threads than to work my ass off in a semi-high position. Sadly this does not get payed though. I think my thoughtfulness beats my intelligence. And I could never cope with the insane pressure in Ivy leagues colleges. I am way too neurotic and conscientious for that.
It would be interesting to join them for some semesters. But my mental fragility and lack of money makes that completely impossible. I wonder how many college students read this thread saying to themselves most average people have no clue how much the pressure tortures them (and financial pressure/the debts). I assume we don't have that many Ivy league members due to the fact it is very time consuming but lurkers I could imagine that. When I worked my ass off career wise I often developed suicidal ideation. Just imagining to jump in front of the train you usually take. The suicide rates in Asia are telling that so much pressure is not good for the human soul. At the same time as a society we really rely on overperformers who are able to work more than 80 hours a week. I certainly don't have the ability to do that. At least if I want to avoid mania. But I know how that feels. When I was manic as a student I worked sometimes 10-12 hours a day daily for months. Though this was not effective at all. It was a pretty stupid but I was young and not aware of my illness.
I wish I was Ivy league educated. But my mind might be even too fragile to finish my bachelor's degree. I educated myself by watching stuff on youtube. I already watched a lot of lectures. I thought of listening to psychoanalysis but it always makes me bitter thinking of how horrendous my parents raised me. And how good my life could have been.
I am ambivalent. The elite gets educated there. A lot of them are conceited and look down at the average Joe and Jane. US colleges are still probably the best of the world. The pressure is allegedly insane so much that wanting to get an A at Haravard or similar colleges leads to a mental breakdown usually
I think for wanting to be an intellectual one has to get a good education. Sadly I am neither that extraordinary smart or educated. I am very thoughtful still. And my superpower to post infinite threads is worthwhile. My whole brain would probably be completely different if I was healthy. All men in the family of my dad have depression. My dad is in my opinion in a very bad shape cognitively. Maybe the manic part of my mind made me sharp but the price I pay is insane. Either way I think even if I was completely healthy I would not have had a great career. I had a way better life but I would never have had reached the peak I wanted to. I think I would have become a frustrated careerist stuck in a bureaucracy. The bond with my friends has become pretty deep since my mental collapse. But love related I am totally cursed. Maybe my qualities are better used posting creative threads than to work my ass off in a semi-high position. Sadly this does not get payed though. I think my thoughtfulness beats my intelligence. And I could never cope with the insane pressure in Ivy leagues colleges. I am way too neurotic and conscientious for that.
It would be interesting to join them for some semesters. But my mental fragility and lack of money makes that completely impossible. I wonder how many college students read this thread saying to themselves most average people have no clue how much the pressure tortures them (and financial pressure/the debts). I assume we don't have that many Ivy league members due to the fact it is very time consuming but lurkers I could imagine that. When I worked my ass off career wise I often developed suicidal ideation. Just imagining to jump in front of the train you usually take. The suicide rates in Asia are telling that so much pressure is not good for the human soul. At the same time as a society we really rely on overperformers who are able to work more than 80 hours a week. I certainly don't have the ability to do that. At least if I want to avoid mania. But I know how that feels. When I was manic as a student I worked sometimes 10-12 hours a day daily for months. Though this was not effective at all. It was a pretty stupid but I was young and not aware of my illness.
