W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
That's it. I've had enough. I love alcohol and that feeling of being drunk, happy and talk about anything while I laugh and forget this damn reality I'm living in but I hate these hangovers which are only getting worse and making me feel more suicidal than ever.
I've been having terrible panic attacks, anxiety and negative thoughts these days! I quit last Sunday. Just like some people on AA, I might screw it up and drink again but I'll do my best not to.

That's it people. Hope if you have alcohol or any drugs problem, can quit too. They're nice because they make us feel better but in my case, I can't stand such sad hangovers any longer!

Thanks for reading me,

Hugs and love to all,

Matt
 
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Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
Wow, that's amazing. That takes a lot of courage. Congratulations and wishing you strength in your recovery.
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
Wow, that's amazing. That takes a lot of courage. Congratulations and wishing you strength in your recovery.
Thank you so much! It's been only two days but I'm feeling already "clean" and less suicidal lol
 
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Deleted member 94

Deleted member 94

Wizard
Mar 24, 2018
696
Congratulations and welcome to feeling better. Not to mention saving money. You should treat yourself once you have saved enough to celebrate.
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
Congratulations and welcome to feeling better. Not to mention saving money. You should treat yourself once you have saved enough to celebrate.

Thanks a bunch!
That's so true! I've been speding lots of money only to get more depressed. Time to save!
 
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Wrennie

Wrennie

-
Dec 18, 2019
1,546
Wow, that takes immense strength of will!

It stinks that something that makes you feel so good has to come with a "catch" though!
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
Wow, that takes immense strength of will!

It stinks that something that makes you feel so good has to come with a "catch" though!
Yeahh, there's always "that catch."
For instance, I've tried ecstasy pills and I felt the happiest person on Earth for 4 hours and then the world sucked and I was the worst human being on Earth lol.
I think "weed" is the only thing that doesn't affect people so badly. I should try to get some!
 
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Spitfire

Enlightened
Apr 26, 2020
1,274
Thank you so much! It's been only two days but I'm feeling already "clean" and less suicidal lol
That is amazing WornOut!!

I am glad it has helped you and hopefully it is for the best for you. Drinking makes me feel bad and I mostly avoid it because I should not really drink anything to be honest, but sometimes I got myself a 24oz can in the past and would drink one or two of those at night for a few days in a row and then I stopped drinking again. I always feel better without it because it makes me sick after drinking it a few days, even drinking only a couple of beers in my case. I rambled but good job man!
 
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Wrennie

Wrennie

-
Dec 18, 2019
1,546
Yeahh, there's always "that catch."
For instance, I've tried ecstasy pills and I felt the happiest person on Earth for 4 hours and then the world sucked and I was the worst human being on Earth lol.
I think "weed" is the only thing that doesn't affect people so badly. I should try to get some!
Lol yeah, weed will only make you hungry. Seems like a worthwhile trade-off in my view.
 
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Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
Thank you so much! It's been only two days but I'm feeling already "clean" and less suicidal lol
Forgot to add that if you fall off the wagon it doesn't mean you're a failure. Just keep trying, that's what counts. I'm not sure if you were a daily drinker, but if you have an AA group in the area you can make some wonderful friends there who will understand what you're going through and support you along the way.
 
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Deleted member 94

Deleted member 94

Wizard
Mar 24, 2018
696
Yeahh, there's always "that catch."
For instance, I've tried ecstasy pills and I felt the happiest person on Earth for 4 hours and then the world sucked and I was the worst human being on Earth lol.
I think "weed" is the only thing that doesn't affect people so badly. I should try to get some!
I wouldn't try weed at all why mess with something that is known to induce psychosis.
 
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Nymph

Nymph

he/him
Jul 15, 2020
2,565
congrats and good luck:hug::heart:
 
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Donk

Donk

Useless since day 1
Jan 3, 2020
1,129
Your liver thanks you. All the best on your journey to sobriety.
 
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Idledays

Member
Mar 29, 2020
32
That's great news @WornOutLife . Hope you feel better for it!

Im working really hard to cut down too. I've only had 1 night drinking since the start of Jan, and I definitely felt my lowest the day after.

Its weird alcohol can somehow convince you its making you happier when its absolutely not!

Massive good luck! Keep us up to date how you get on!
 
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L

life-eternal

Student
Nov 11, 2020
115
I think what you are going through is called Kindling. I have it too. It happens to people who have abused alcohol and benzos especially, giving us a terrible hangover.

For close to a year i would get out of my mind on benzos and drink like a monster, because i wanted to not wake up. I would take like 6 xanax and drink a bottle of whiskey. I would wake up so fucking scared that i couldn't believe how i was feeling. I ended up going to church once because i had no idea what else to do, i was completely terrified. I got to a point i stopped taking benzos, BUT! Then when i would just get hammered on whisky or the likes, i would feel the exact same fucking thing! The only thing i can properly drink now is beer, but if i have some whiskey or rum then i can only drink a little, or else i know the morning after i will suffer from heavy kindling. If you look up alcohol kindling you can read up on it!

Sorry you feel this way bro, the good thing is that after 3-4 days, your brain goes back to normal :) So if you can kind of control your emotions or not rage at family or friends for those 3-4 days after that you are golden
 
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awfullife

awfullife

Arcanist
Nov 16, 2019
435
Congrats @WornOutLife.
Recovery is a journey and life becomes more vivid.
At one point in our lives alcohol was fun and stress relieving and cool...those days have long past.
Our love affair with alcohol serves it better than us. It leaves us feeling anxious, empty, and embarrassed.
Be rid of it. Find a group near you. We are all the same and there is an amazing energy amongst a group of recovering folks.
Be well
 
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life-eternal

Student
Nov 11, 2020
115
Just to make clear i sympathise with your posts a lot, i am an alcoholic also, and i dont think i will ever not be. If i had the money and an ok place to live by myself, i would never EVER stop drinking, it is the only thing in this world that has truly helped my depression (but ironically the thing that makes me suicidal the most!). I have been an alcoholic for close to 4 years now. This includes me going absolutely shitfaced to work, making a fool out of myself, hurting people, embarrassing myself, moving countries one day to the next, everything you can put in a list that an alcoholic might do. I've used it as a crutch for pretty much all my problems lol including going out with girls, or meeting new people and now realising that without it i am pretty much nothing. Hope you feel better man!
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ Sometimes I'm stressed
Jul 1, 2020
6,825
thats awesome dude :hug::heart: im working on cutting back on weed. it tends to not only negate the effects of my med but make things worse in general
 
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Amumu

Amumu

Ctb - temporary solution for a permanent problem
Aug 29, 2020
2,624
Alcohol can be hell on earth. Good job.
 
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ohhgeeitsme

ohhgeeitsme

Wizard
Feb 5, 2020
694
This is great news! Congrats!
I honestly don't know if I would have ever been able to stop if it weren't for the horrible hangovers that lasted for days and especially the 'hangxiety' that was absolutely crippling. Of course, I already have anxiety, but it is far worse when drinking. Even if I did nothing wrong or embarrassing, it still felt like I did afterward. So when I actually did do something embarrassing (which was often), it was just way too much to handle. I made an absolute fool of myself far too many times. Whenever I started drinking heavily, things would get really dark for me and yeah, I'm definitely way more suicidal. I may be depressed now, but I much prefer how I feel currently than how I feel when I'm drinking. If I started drinking again, I wouldn't stand a chance. I know I'll never go back to that.
I wish you the best of luck! It isn't easy, but you can definitely do it!
 
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MindFrog

MindFrog

:Professional Hypocrite:
Nov 19, 2020
723
That's good to hear! Hope you get significant progress from it.
 
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Romeo

Romeo

Member
Sep 4, 2020
31
Congrats! Alcohol and drugs are like usury money, at first you benefit from them but then you will have to pay back all with interests.
 
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BluesRunTheGame

BluesRunTheGame

Blackpilled
Dec 15, 2020
1,715
I drank every day but quit for 14 months (treatment, meetings, etc.) then went back to bingeing last summer which is highly problematic but I don't know how else to break up my depressive, lonely unemployed lockdown malaise. If I had some kind of life I reckon I'd be more up for quitting again.
 
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W

WaitingForTheBusInTh

Student
Nov 18, 2020
174
I'm gonna be a mega weeb for doing this but,
Ganbate!!!!!!
I believe in you! But always remember if you happen to fall off the wagon it's not defeat!
 
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G

Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,017
Good job! Your wallet and lack of hangovers will thank you. You should for sure try weed. It's all the good aspects and none of the hangover.
 
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WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,164
Good job! Your wallet and lack of hangovers will thank you. You should for sure try weed. It's all the good aspects and none of the hangover.

I haven't been drinking for 2 weeks and this is happening to me!
I have more money and my body is thanking me for the lack of hangovers haha.

As for weed, I've only tried it a few times but I don't any dealers here lol.
 
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L

loopylou

Learn to fly
Jan 11, 2021
884
Yeahh, there's always "that catch."
For instance, I've tried ecstasy pills and I felt the happiest person on Earth for 4 hours and then the world sucked and I was the worst human being on Earth lol.
I think "weed" is the only thing that doesn't affect people so badly. I should try to get some!
Ecstasy has the worst hangover ever it takes days to come down off of that. Really not pleasant . I cope cope with it during my younger days but not now
 
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Life.Journey.Unknown

Life.Journey.Unknown

I'm not strong enough for life.
Feb 24, 2020
65
Congratulations on you decision!
Yeah hangovers, dizzy spinning feeling are horrible. I found that when I had too much to drink my depression came on much worse.
 
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E

Endeavour

Mage
Dec 13, 2020
566
A world without alcohol is like a beautiful woman without an eye (the original quote, I can't remember who it was but you're talking 18th/19th century was a meal without cheese is like a beautiful woman without an eye).

Ditto the alcohol.
 
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Natty

Student
Jul 27, 2020
138
I'm glad stopping drinking has had a positive effect on you. You just need to make sure that you don't end up with pink cloud syndrome. Don't stop here, don't get complacent, keep it rolling.

I had a horrible alcohol addiction and I was drinking liters of vodka a day. I ended up in rehab, and I failed at quitting several times before I finally got it to stick, the problem I had was that people say that eliminating vices like alcohol leads directly to a better life, and that just wasn't the case for me.
 
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